"Diversity is not only about race" - a contribution to the school. Intro-question

Participating In a vibrant community of different values, cultures, and personalities is part of modern human growth. The acceptation of one another is part of life. Diversity is not all about the color of one's skin, but, also, the perception of one's values and personality. As I think of diversity and what it means to me, I think of equality that is seen and should be seen by every eye. In any society, variety makes a rich culture because of the variety in and about it. .As Maya Angelou quoted "We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color." Diversity is not only about race but, also, life experiences and beliefs. As a growing individual, I have been through various experiences. Some which have made me stronger and others that have made me wiser. I would contribute to the effervescent Rutgers community because of the activities I take part in, the values I hold, and because of the experiences I have been through.

I would contribute to the effervescent Rutgers community because of the activities I take part in, the values I hold, and because of the experiences I have been through.

...Well talk about them! haha
I feel that I could write the first part of this essay because it is a common statement and millions of people share what you just said about diversity. What I could not write is about the experiences you had or the activities you participate in the made you more open to ideas.

The question is how you would contribute to the school, so talk about you personally through personal experiences. They don't want to know what diversity means to you, they want to know how you are diverse.

It is a good idea.. but you need to talk about you and not something millions of people share an idea about. Get it?

Please return the favor--/undergraduate-admission-2/snowy-strug gels-personal-refelction-common-app-essay-idea-20835/

~Thank You

should i elaborate in my intro?

Yes. add some more details.
If this is only an intro just give a brief overview of how you contributed then expand on them. But don't waste words

That is good advice for any essayist.

Here is an example:
As I think of diversity and what it means to me, I think of Diversity among us should be characterized by equality that is seen and should be seen by every eye.

As Maya Angelou quoted stated, "We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must...

I think this sentence would be a great first sentence of the essay. ----->I would contribute to the effervescent Rutgers community because of the activities I take part in, the values I hold, and because of the experiences I have been through.---And you should name some of the experiences.

:-)