Here is the prompt for my admissions essay:Write an essay which conveys to the reader a sense of who you are. Possible topics may include, but are not limited to, experiences which have shaped your life, the circumstances of your upbringing, your most meaningful intellectual achievement, the way you see the world - the people in it, events great and small, everyday life - or any personal theme which appeals to your imagination. Please remember that we are concerned not only with the substance of your prose but with your writing style as well. We prefer that you limit yourself to approximately 250-500 words (or 1-2 pages).
Here is the essay:
Ambitious, motivated, and even invincible are ideas and characteristics that I strive towards being every day of my life. I am a person who is most satisfied when doing something constructive and fulfill time without wasting a nanosecond. I urge myself to accept challenges and never accept present success as the end. I believe that there is always room to develop, improve and innovate the past into something new. These ideas influence my life and are the blueprints towards my milestones.
I think that I am the architect and engineer of my life. If I do something productive, then my life is filled with experiences that I will never regret. As in any blueprint, there are decisions that contribute to the elements of a product. For me choices and desires to do certain things make up my life and determine where I go. Choices and desires are two elements that will always affect me and whatever I do it involves making a decision. When deciding on a career goal, I saw my future in civil engineering because it involves my idea of infusing my life with productive things and fulfilling my life to the fullest extent. My ambition and dedication to absolute fulfillment in life drive me towards an engineering career. With these ideas, I dedicate my life in doing my best despite the intricacy of a task. I am prepared to accept any challenge that comes my way. When someone asks for help I take that request as an opportunity for me to learn something so that I can build on my knowledge and innovate it in to something that one day will contribute to a goal that I have. Even if whatever I am given is something that is completely new to me, I consider it as a chance for me to apply what I know to realize something that I don't know. I have no boundaries to the tasks that I can complete. As a result of thirst to break the limitations of the unknown and I have decided to apply to Polytechnic Institute.
After looking at the campus of Polytechnic Institute from website photos and a visit there, I saw that this is the ideal college for me to continue towards an engineering profession. Polytechnic Institute is the archetype of engineering and contemporary education. It is very accessible to students through the benefits of it being in an urban setting. It is one of the few institutions in New York City providing engineering as one of the academic majors. I believe that from Polytechnic Institute I will be able to acquire knowledge to the highest potential, of not just engineering but about life, people and the entire world at various perspectives. I am not applying to Polytechnic Institute just because it is a well known college; instead I am applying because I see that it fits my ability and capacity of learning. It is my desire to have the opportunity to become a great asset to the world and I believe it starts here at Polytechnic Institute.
Can you edit my essay and see if give me pointers. Is this essay too general, any errors, pr any problems involving the essay related to the prompt?
Waiting for reply... thanks