I've been struggling with this quite a bit, and the deadline to get this application in looms.
==================================
Over the past year there have been phrases I find myself repeating in essays and conversations, almost a mantra.
I tell stories.
I need to make something.
I could go on at length with a flowery dissertation about self-discovery, social commentary, and wanting to make a difference in the world, but push down past all the sophistry and making film is about doing what I enjoy. It's about doing the things that make me feel complete, if not always happy. It's about sudden moments when a torrent of words and ideas rush in, and the need to channel it out. It's about the need to tell, to show, to explore, to remember, and to understand. It's about being filled with ideas and wanting to pour them out like a pitcher. It's about using a moving image to say something greater than words. It's about showing someone something that moves them. I make film because I love to make film and I love to animate. It's what I am meant to do. It's what I need to do.
I will animate. This is a given. My skills as an animator are growing by leaps and bounds with every completed project and experiment. Animation is a way for me to bring ideas to life, to see my mind made manifest as I imagine strange worlds, spaces, and creatures. Ray Harryhousen put it succinctly when he said that there's a nightmarish and dream-like quality to stop motion animation that computer generated images can't quite match, so this style in particular lends itself to fantasy and surreal spaces. Experimental animation, meanwhile, embodies a sense of discovery; the rewarding sense of testing new methods of visually conveying information and emotion and creating something beautiful outside of the traditional narrative framework.
To continue to grow and refine my skills I need to immerse myself deeply in the most vibrant art community I can find. I need to dive into a large metropolitan environment with easy access to a variety of theaters and museums. I need to expose myself to the widest range of artistic styles and influences available. I've attended local micro-cinema screenings in Asheville, and traveled hours to film festivals. Every time I come away inspired. I was moved by the work of a number of experimental film collectives at the Florida Experimental Film Festival (FLEX) to create a multi-projector performance piece that was composed of a 16mm stop-motion animation and multiple film loops. This performance has since branched out and inspired a number of other projects including a 5 minute 16mm experimental cameraless film and a glitch film encapsulating the degradation of analog media on multiple platforms. I need more of that. I need to come to SAIC for regular access to multiple art theaters and screenings, exposure to artwork that's challenging and inspiring, a throng of peers to bounce ideas through, and a place to make everything that comes from the cauldron of my mind once that witches brew of ideas has had a chance to swirl about and boil. Since attending FLEX I've had my work accepted and screened at a handful of film festivals, and as the months go by I'll be screening in more. I want to make a name for myself as an animator and a filmmaker. To do that I need to find the right environment to get exposure for my work, and to expose myself to the works that will push me further. My experimental animation in particular would benefit from the experimental scene and community thriving in Chicago.
In my time at BRCC I've run volunteered for the school TV station, usually running cameras for events and interviews. As president of the BRCC Film Club I've arranged over a dozen screenings and discussions of great classic films, run a small fund-raiser, and managed a our yearly Talent Show. As a Work-Study for the film program I handled gear check-out and maintenance, assisted students and adjunct professors with access to equipment and facilities, and provided crew and assistance on many student projects. Word goes around that between all that and the work I do on my own films, I must have given up sleep a long time ago. That's the kind of fervor I have for film and animation, and it's the kind of driven curiosity to see what I can make next that I will bring to SAIC.
