UC Prompt #2:
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
My first prompt essay was really long (about 720 words) and since this one is mcuh shorter, i was wondering if it is adequate enough in its analysis and detail. Thank you very much.
A strong belief for my family and for myself personally, is that respect toward one's own culture should be a critical aspect of life that is to be held closely to one's heart. Some conflict, however, arises when one's heritage consists of numerous cultures. Having roots in both Armenian and Russian cultures, yet living the first six years of my life in a mostly Russian-speaking part of Ukraine, really deprived me of knowing much about my Armenian heritage. Everyone either spoke Russian or Ukrainian, so naturally my first language was Russian, with Armenian not being present at all. My father later told me that he had to comply with society and let me adopt most Russian customs into my life so that I may grow up as part of the majority of society, not be odd or cut off in any way. When I moved to the US, however, and lived in Glendale, California, where there is a large majority of Armenians, I was exposed to the other half of my initially missing culture.
I did not know Armenian, nor was I familiar with any of the traditions or customs that my father's family shared. Feeling so odd and left out as a child, I subconsciously set a goal for myself to learn Armenian and integrate myself into my new surroundings. With strong determination, in a few years time I was able to fully understand Armenian and while not speak it perfectly, still be able to hold a conversation with my uncles, aunts and other relatives without much trouble. I felt much more comfortable and fit in with the family much better than before; I felt proud to be able to touch upon the other half of my blood and overall felt much more spiritually complete. Yet while living surrounded by Armenians and being enveloped in Armenian customs, I had decided that I would not be subject to the same fault as before in Ukraine. I decided that I would learn to live respecting and remembering both of my cultural counterparts and keeping a harmonious unity between the two, and I have done so successfully today.
I think the best thing to do is cut down on the first one a bit and add more to this. Also, you might want to consider writing about a different accomplishment or talent for this essay. This is because in this one, you talk a lot about your culture and background, which is what they want in the first essay. In this essay, they want to learn more about something like a hobby and how it impacts you. Just something to consider :)
I decided that I would learn to live respecting and remembering both of my cultural
heritages and keeping a harmonious unity between the two, and I have done so successfully today.
A counterpart is something different: thefreedictionary.com/counterpart
At the end of this, you should tell us about "the person you are." This is the most important part. Your job is to show them that you are firm in your resolve to embark upon this career that starts with your education at their school. Therefore, use the experience as a way to illustrate the REAL subject of the essay, which it YOU.
Here is a place where a similar mistake was made:
https://essayforum.com/undergraduate-2/quality-marching-band-10347/