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economic causes; Essay on the reasons for attending APUS


FredParisFrance 61 / 7  
Apr 13, 2007   #1
Hello: this is the prompt:

You are beginning a new experience by attending APUS. Take some time to reflect on your decision to embark on this journey. Think about the reasons behind your decision to be a learner at this time. People are motivated to attend college for various reasons. It may be to increase their knowledge, to learn a new skill, to prepare for a career, to make friends, etc. Why are you attending college? What do you hope to gain from the experience? What qualities or skills do you have that make you suited for studying in a technological age? What will you do that will make you successful at this? What things do you feel will be a challenge to you and how will you overcome them? Cite examples and provide reasons and support for your answers.

This is my essay:

Dire straits or money for nothing?

The decision to attend college has undeniably always been of tremendous significance. However, the third millennium offers new possibilities because in parallel of the traditional brick and mortar colleges, digital universities have progressively appeared over the past decade. However, what triggers someone to enter such a kind of virtual institution of higher education? What can expect an individual from them? Does it necessitate particular competences? Do the curriculums present new or supplementary impediments? What are the ingredients of a successful story? Such questions haunt the nights of countless would-be students, and especially one of them: me.

Economic and social reasons are the major constitutive factors that sparked off my motivation for attending college. Conventional wisdom has it that a degree has monetary implications on the employment market. However, in 1998, a study conducted by Institute for Higher Education Policy confirmed that degree holders harvest more financial benefits than high school graduates or dropouts. The first clue is that a Bachelor notably increases the earning power by about 75%. The second indicator is that unemployment rate with a Bachelor is half as important as with a High School Diploma. The third gain is in relation with savings since a graduate has a superior pecuniary potential and therefore economizes more. The fourth point is concerned with working conditions. Indeed, graduates habitually keep white-collar jobs. Accordingly, the employee's situation is less strenuous and health impairing. The fifth indicator is of noteworthy weight in global economy for linked with the professional, and to some extent personal, mobility.

On the one hand, among that trouble, two other social motives are fundamental for my common law wife and me. Actually, our goal is to create a family and provide our household with maximum security in the long term as regards health protection and quality of life for our future progeny.

All those pointers emphasize the non-degree recipients' concerns. Lastly, partly due to the evolution of the global and French Defense Industries added to my personal situation, since I am currently unemployed and only holder of a High School Diploma, these considerations are all the more pertinent for me. Those reflections aroused a firm determination in me to pursue further studies not only at a college but also at an American and military specialized university, and in the case in point: American Military University.

The journey I have just embarked on would be wholly rewarding if I could improve several aspects. First, my aim is to ameliorate my professional outlooks. I intend to orientate my career toward domains in which I am interested in working for, namely the International Relations and the Military History. For that reason, I have chosen to apply for a Bachelor in International Relations with a concentration in Regional and Comparative Politics and I want to adjoin a minor in Military History. I also plan to enroll in various courses which central theme is Special Operations. Second, I expect to broaden my job opportunities. Insofar as the American Military University syllabus requires intensive writing, I have the hope to approach academic fluency and style in English. That ability will help me to obtain a job in an English speaking company. Nevertheless, in addition to the pleasure felt when mastering a foreign language, this skill will mainly flatter my ego and might open vistas on Graduate Schools or journalism. Third, I desire to initiate a preparation for research methods in the fields quoted above by taking courses in research methodology. Finally, even if I did not work for an English speaking business or for unrelated fields I shall always be literate in topics that fascinate me, such as global politics and military history. Another benefit from my encounter with the academic field is the possibility to develop a personal and professional network through forums and emails with my classmates.

Studying in the technological age comes down to study in the same way as in antiquity but with high-tech tools. Actually, students ranging from the Plato's Academy to the Harvard's lecture halls necessitate the same expertise. This is neither a godsend nor an innate talent but an aggregate knowledge that requires painstaking and industrious efforts. Thanks to my education in a French Defense Department school, I have learnt a scientific method for schoolwork. Specifically,

I scrutinize the question to extract the topic and the purpose and thus direct further explorations. Next, I brainstorm to investigate as many ideas as possible. Subsequently, I found my research from a wide variety of sources such as books, magazines, and websites. Finally, I analyze raw data to produce synthesized and relevant information, and consequently achieve the elaboration of unequivocal theories or concepts. Moreover, I have been working since fourteen years and have frequently been using that methodology.

I will lean my studies on a practical and efficient routine. In the beginning, I will define the tasks assigned and categorize the adequate data to fulfill the assignment. Second, I will look for sources and cogitate to appraise their relevance. This will initiate a selection of the finest records within the resources. Afterward, I will synthesize the multiple facts. Subsequently, I will engage in a critical thinking procedure to evaluate both form and content to estimate the quality of the organization plus the substance of the beliefs. Finally, I will present the result of that work.

Despite that seems to be a strong background to undertake undergraduate studies, some arrows pierce my Achilles' heel. Actually, I have never worked with electronic resources. Therefore, I desire to become skilled at locating and utilizing appropriate sources available within the online library such as online catalogs, periodicals, e-books, databases, Internet online resources, and community or government information. Furthermore, my previous experience mainly concerns technological applications, figures and statistical calculations. Consequently, I want to acquire the skills to identify and apply specific criteria to appraise the value of primary and secondary sources in social sciences and humanities such as interviews, surveys, and experiments but also in electronic resources, e-mail, online discussions.

My reasons for undertaking higher education are firmly rooted in economic causes. Furthermore, my motivation drinks in the source of higher earning and facilitated employment promises. Not only is my first intention to attend college the fruit of an obligation, but it also has required important sacrifices for my common law wife and me. Therefore, I have the firm intention to benefit from a current window of opportunity although the journey will resemble more the Odyssey of Homer than a Sunday walk in the countryside. Nevertheless, I know I will get nothing for nothing and do not want to compromise the possibility to access to a more remunerating future. As for knowing if "money can't buy happiness" is true, this is another debate.

Institute for Higher Education Policy. Reaping the Benefits: Defining the Public and Private Value of Going to College.
EF_Team2 1 / 1,708  
Apr 13, 2007   #2
Greetings!

Your writing is very good, and your command of English very impressive! I think you do a marvelous job of answering the prompt. My suggestions have to do mainly with word choice, to express your English more like a native English-speaker:

What can expect an individual from them? - Say "What can an individual expect from them?"
Does it necessitate particular competences? - I think you mean "competencies."
curriculums - the plural of curriculum is curricula (it still uses a Latin ending)
a graduate has a superior pecuniary potential and therefore economizes more. - I'm not sure you mean "economizes"; that refers to saving money; to be frugal.

graduates habitually keep white-collar jobs. - to "keep" a job means not to lose it; I think you mean they work at white-collar jobs.

among that trouble, - this phrase does not translate well to English; you could leave it out and be fine.
I intend to orientate my career toward domains in which I am interested in working for, namely the International Relations and the Military History. - Remove "in which" and both "the"s; English doesn't use as many articles as French, though it can be difficult to tell when to leave them out. :-)

students ranging from the Plato's Academy to the Harvard's lecture halls - same thing here; leave out "the" both times (I like your analogy, though).

I have learnt a scientific method for schoolwork. - This is a small matter, but "learnt" is British English; Americans say "learned."

Subsequently, I found my research from a wide variety of sources such as books, magazines, and websites. - You have been using present tense; stick with it and say "I find..."

I have been working since fourteen years and have frequently been using that methodology. - English does not use "since" quite the same as the French "depuis"; if you mean you started working 14 years ago, say "I have been working for fourteen years"; if you mean you were 14 years of age when you started, say, "I have been working since the age of fourteen..." Also, it would probably be better to say "and have frequently used that methodology"

Despite that seems to be a strong background to undertake undergraduate studies - "that" isn't quite right here. I think it would be better to say, "Despite what seems to be a strong background for undertaking undergraduate studies..."

You're doing very well! Great job!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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