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how editorship helped me discover career goals - UW prompt


lehcar3 1 / 1  
Dec 16, 2010   #1
Prompt: * a character-defining moment,
* the cultural awareness you've developed,
* a challenge faced,

* a personal hardship or barrier overcome.

Recommended length: 500-650 words

My Essay:

As the only junior on the senior staff of "The Rising Tide", our high-school newspaper, I should have seen it coming. Every single person except me would be graduating. A light, an alarm bell, something loud and wild should have gone off in my head. I would be the only person returning the next year to the staff. I would have in my hands the sole responsibility of continuing the school paper only rescued from extinction five years before by a girl perhaps even more ambitious than I- and certainly with more ideas.

I would have to be the editor. Editor, or editor-in-chief, it would turn out, became a misnomer, but that comes later. Ms. Smith, the newspaper adviser, came to me for a meeting. She spoke of next year as if it was obvious that no one other than I would be running the show. I took on the responsibility with gusto. I'm known to take on the most Mount Everest-like tasks, because I love being directive and shouldering a great deal of responsibility.

During the summer before this year, the newspaper staff went to a "journalism camp" at Central Washington University. Nerdy? Certainly. But it was incredibly beneficial. The learning section I signed up for was "editorial leadership". I realized, hey...I get to be the boss. It soon became much more than that. That session showed me how I could make something my own. The paper became me, my baby, my passion. I scribbled volumes of notes of my goals and ideas and thoughts and inspirations at the camp. I learned everything from organizational methods to what to do with that one misfit kid on staff.

I am not particularly passionate about journalism by itself. This sounds bad, but it's true. I do like writing news stories, and digging for information, and compiling it cohesively. But what ended up interesting me more was the entire process, and what I could do with it. There's the actual layout of the page done on Adobe InDesign (which takes hours and hours longer than you think it will...goodbye sleep), there's editing others' stories, there's contacting local businesses for advertisements, there's planning the production schedule for the whole year around life stopping, earth-shattering high school events like prom, there's brainstorming ideas for stories, there's making very important decisions.

That's what I found I love more, the whole process. This is what showed me what I want to do as a career. I am incredibly ambitious and I tend to take on the most ambitious projects I can, for the sole reason that I love being responsible. This is what has shown me I'm interested in business and entrepreneurship, I like planning, organizing, testing, execution, and reaping the results. I like having a lot of responsibility on my shoulders. The reward is always great: a feeling of accomplishment, the drive to accomplish more and the knowledge that I can.

A few issues ago, I delivered a stack of papers to a calculus class (the staff hand-delivers the papers to each class when the issue comes out.) When I came in with the paper, I said, "Rising Tide's here!" People started cheering and hurried up to get an issue. This made me so happy I almost started crying. They wanted it! All of my hard work, all of my efforts and nights working until 3am on layout, sketchily staying alone at school until midnight, lack of sleep, food and air, made these people happy. It entertained them. The fact that I could do that gave me such a good feeling.

Conclusion is wonky...I'm unsure how to sum it up or where/how I can insert more of a thesis statement in the beginning. Thanks!
coeurreign 2 / 45  
Dec 16, 2010   #2
I'm known to take on the most Mount Everest-like tasks, because I love being directive and shouldering a great deal of responsibility.For some reason, this sentence is very off-putting to me. I kind of feel like you like being in charge, but "directive" makes you seem kind of bossy.

During the summer before this year, the newspaper staff went to a "journalism camp" at Central Washington University. Nerdy? Certainly. lol cute. Definitely keep this.ButHowever, it was incredibly beneficial. The learning section I signed up for was "editorial leadership". This seems a bit wonky to me. Try rephrasing. I realized, hey...I get to be the boss. It soon became much more than that. That session showed me how I could make something my own. The paper became me, my baby, and my passion. I scribbled volumes of notes of my goals and ideas and thoughts and inspirations you overused the word "and" here. Try commas. at the camp.

cohesively. ButHowever what ended up interesting

There's the actual layout of the page done on Adobe InDesign (which takes hours and hours longer than you think it will...goodbye sleep), there's editing others' stories, there's contacting local businesses for advertisements, there's planning the production schedule for the whole year around life stopping, earth-shattering high school events like prom, there's brainstorming ideas for stories, there's making very important decisions.Don't use brackets. And hey there run-on sentence. lol, shorten it up.

This is what has shown me I'm interested in business and entrepreneurship; I like planning, organizing, testing, execution, and reaping the results.

It's a good essay. Personally, the last paragraph shouldn't even be there. I think the whole "accomplish more and knowledge" thing is a conclusion, kind of. lol, it obviously can be better written, but use that as a starting point and just go from there. Good luck!
OP lehcar3 1 / 1  
Dec 16, 2010   #3
thanks courreign! I actually had "in charge" and then changed it to directive because I wanted to sound LESS bossy hahah! I'm struggling with this one. And I agree, the last paragraph kinda sucks, but I'm worried that without an example as specific as that, it doesn't fit the prompt which asks for

"an experience". I don't know if my whole year of editoring so far counts as an "experience". I suppose it does.

Do you think I need more of a thesis statement at the beginning? I'm wondering where it could fit in.

And you're right, I know brackets are aesthetically tacky and I'd rather not use them, I'm worried the paragraph about me describing my editorial duties is more of a boring run-on list and that it sounds too informal. Any ideas on how to spiff it up?

Thanks so much for replying! :)


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