Hi. I would really appreciate some feedback on my essay! Thank you :)
Our mission states: "Trinity College is a community united in a quest for excellence in liberal arts education. Our purpose is to foster critical thinking, free the mind of parochialism and prejudice, and prepare students to lead examined lives that are personally satisfying, civically responsible, and socially useful." How would you engage the mission of Trinity College during your years on campus? (250-650 words).
trinity "independent thinking"
Having attended boarding school since 6th grade, for 9 months each year I followed a cut and dry routine of how I spent my time--5 o'clock morning exercise, 7 o'clock breakfast, 8 o'clock classes, 1 o'clock lunch, 2 o'clock classes, 4 o'clock on the sports field, 6 o'clock study hour, 8 o'clock dinner and lights out by 11--a schedule that has been indelibly imprinted on my mind, and will probably remain even after I leave school. This routine was laced with a set of rules and regulations that kept reminding me to keep my hair neat, shoes polished, nails trimmed and to be well behaved. I was expected to do certain things, things that were expected out of every student in my school. Discipline and obedience were held in higher regard than critical thinking and creative engagement.
What draws me to Trinity College is that it believes in "independent thinking", something I have always longed to do. At the same time, I realize that the freedom to think independently comes with the responsibility to be aware of the consequences of your thoughts and actions. I wish to incorporate the discipline I have acquired through my years at boarding school and direct it toward helping me delve into broader learning possibilities in a constructive way. Only then will I be able to truly develop a perspective of my own.
At Trinity, I want to pursue Liberal Arts education in its true sense. Here, i will not be confined to one particular area of study, and can develop critical interdisciplinary insights. When my beliefs are tested and challenged by different, sometimes contradicting perspectives, it is bound to foster critical thinking. I might be forced to question certain beliefs that I hold true or face moral dilemmas, but I am willing to push the boundaries. My main interests lie in biological sciences, driven by my fascination with biological systems and the underlying mechanisms behind how they function. However, I want to incorporate aspects of the arts and interdisciplinary courses into my education, in order to explore the social, ethical and environmental implications of my work in biology. Awareness and knowledge are the key to making informed decisions and overcoming prejudice and stereotypes. As I examine my work and ideas through various viewpoints, I hope to develop the skills, patience, attentiveness to not only produce independent thought but learn how to transform thought into meaningful action.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4782 Muskan, I do not think that you are properly responding to the prompt requirement at all. You are thinking of the academic setting of the university and connecting it with your rigid boarding school life. What you should be doing though, is thinking about how you can use the social and civic opportunities at the university to help you engage in building your sense of civic duty and responsibility. By being socially useful, you will be able to refer to a personal growth that allows the freedom to achieve something other than the academic expectations of the university. In order to better discuss this prompt, you will need to familiarize yourself with the extra curricular activities at the campus that reflect the liberal arts education of the university. You have to focus on explaining how you will develop your sense of critical thinking in relation to the current changes ongoing in society. These should tie in either with the classes you are going to take or the activities that you will have outside of the academic field. For example, will you be doing volunteer work at shelters? Helping at soup kitchens sponsored by the college? Or perhaps, you have plans to join their outreach programs to help needy communities? Whatever the method, these need to be activities that will cover 4 years of your college life. Give an idea as to what kind of personal and social growth you hope to attain by participating in these activities and why you believe that it is important for you to do your part with regards to these situations. That should tie in with the "critical thinking, free the mind of parochialism and prejudice" which in the end should allow you live a "personally satisfying life on the social and civic fronts". The essay that you wrote doesn't really represent that specifically in the essay. You need to show that you are familiar with the university programs otherwise, your response is nothing more than a generic reference to possibly applicable reasons. That does not always work because your discussion will not completely represent the prompt requirements. That is what happened in this case.
