entrance essay to F I T ..Why would it be to your advantage to participate in the Pro

I would like to know if i am on the right track and what else to add to make it a strong essay...ps the last paragraph is just thoughts

Why would it be to your advantage to participate in the ProTrack Engineering Co-op program option or a hands-on internship through Florida Tech?

I am a practical learner. This was confirmed by a professional evaluation done before entering high school. It was also discovered that I suffer from dyslexia. In 1968, the World Federation of Neurologists defined dyslexia as "a disorder in children who, despite conventional classroom experience, fail to attain the language skills of reading, writing, and spelling commensurate with their intellectual abilities". During high school despite attending classes and understanding I was challenged by the examinations which were mostly required written essay responses and minimal practical response. This is the reason for applying to Florida tech. I know it would be to my advantage to participate in hands- on internship program through Florida. It is easier for me to comprehend something if I have first-hand experience with it also it provides the opportunity to apply knowledge from ones classes to actual real life problems in the field.

This opportunity not only provides work experience which is needed in the world today to get a job but also experience with equipment , which makes me more marketable in the hunt for a job after. This internship program also gives me the chance to explore different areas related to my field of interest. This program will also allow an international student lik me the ability gain some financial support while there.

I have some ideas to help you with your paper.

During high school despite attending classes and understanding I was challenged by the examinations which were mostly required written essay responses and minimal practical response.

You address you dyslexia, but you seem to ramble about your school experience, which is distracting when reading this. You answer the question well, but introducing with the learning disability is a little off-track. The purpose is to promote the skills you do have ( I realize that you need to explain why one program is best for you).

This opportunity not only provides work experience which is needed in the world today to get a job but also experience with equipment , which makes me more marketable in the hunt for a job after. This internship program also gives me the chance to explore different areas related to my field of interest. This program will also allow an international student lik me the ability gain some financial support while there.

Here, you have the right idea, this ought to be the core of your paper. The college wants to hear that you are an intelligent person with talent/skills that will fuel your desire to graduate. You must present yourself as a person with a plan, that you have goals: short-term and long term. Link your goals/passions to the program, and explain how the program will be a stepping stone on the path to success.