Unanswered [10] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 3


"The essential is only visible to the heart " supplement essay


ninasong 4 / 11  
Dec 26, 2010   #1
hope you all had a wonderful christmas!
I am thankful for all advices feedback and grammar corrections!! dont take it easy on me!

What book has influenced you most

"Here is my secret. It is very simple: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye" (The Little Prince)

Unlike any other books I have read the Little Prince countless times. However, every single time I understand the book a bit different.
...
nishabala 4 / 91  
Dec 26, 2010   #2
The last sentence in your second to last paragraph's incomplete.
Otherwise, stellar job! Great concept and parallels drawn, I think it's beautiful:) Couple of things:
'Unlike any other books'-> Book, not books.
'leaving my parents guard'-> I think 'leaving my parent's sphere of control' is a wee bit more appropriate.
"The first time I have ever read the book was when I just learnt reading. From the innocent eyes of a six year old girl I understood the little prince perfectly. As the little prince I could not understand why the big people were always so busy, never had time to play. Therefore, I loved the book because it expressed my feelings. One can only see true happiness rightly with the heart." It SHOULD be "I first read the book when I learnt how to read.", and innocent mind instead of eyes? Or heart? Or even perspective?

"On the annual day he returned solely with his soul!"-> Awkward wording, and I don't understand what you mean.
don't say 'pubertal'... it doesn't sound pretty. Too abstract a reasoning for you to accept just like that, but consider:)
'One can only see true love rightly with the heart": get rid of rightly. Also, bad placement of the sentence, cause it doesn't transition well with the previous one... you need to mention your search for true love before you say this.

", I became more and more"-> "I had become more and more..."
also, big people's-> adult's? SO much cleaner.
And, the last line... the transition isn't clear... ease the quote in better throughout the essay.

I also would suggest you put a short summary of the book in somewhere. I've read it, but what if your reader hasn't?

Good luck!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 6, 2011   #3
If it is plural, put the apostrophe after the s:
'leaving my parents' sphere of control' is a wee bit more appropriate.

I think you chose a great quote for the intro because it starts be mentioning a secret. Whenever the word secret is used, it gets people's attention! :-)


Home / Undergraduate / "The essential is only visible to the heart " supplement essay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳