Prompt: Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete with it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
my love for creatures and nature
Before I wrote this essay, I asked my parents and my close friends, "What do you think of me?"To my surprise, all of their answers were that I have a special love for creatures and nature. Then I was lost in thought. I looked into myself. I found myself a person commune with nature. So I'd like to introduce myself from my communication with nature.
When it comes to my love for nature, it evolves from my innate curiosity about creatures and I'm always keen on exploring the origin of things. Once I was young, I found out that apples, oranges or other fruits I'd eaten have seeds but bananas don't. I wonder where bananas come from if they don't have seeds! So I asked my mom and I got the answer that banana tree will grow a new one through its stalks under the ground. I kept on asking why only bananas grow like that but others not. I seemed so serious about the doubt that my mom drew a picture for me and explained how gene usually be passed on from generation to generation. But bananas is a kind of plant called triploid so it can't pass down the gene in a usual way, which lead to its special way to grow. It is my curiosity and keeping on asking why that lead to such full of spirit of exploration. So I every time I learn a new thing or discover something new, I will guess and then explore. If I can't get the satisfied answer temporarily, I will keep it in my heart and search the answer through my everyday life.
I'm fascinated about creatures' structures and their working theories. I'm patient to observe their procedure of working and interested in doing experiments to test my hypothesis. I first noticed human imitating animals' structures when I was in primary school. I tried to drag a gecko from the wall but failed. I found it incredible that such a tiny body should has such huge power. I asked my father and I knew suckers' inventor was gecko! I was interested in how flytraps could catch insects so I bought a pot of flytrap and carefully put an insect onto its trap with a camera filming it. At first, nothing happened. Suddenly, the flytrap closed swiftly and tightly. After reviewing countless times of the video tape, I guess it might be the sticks on the trap that play the tricks. The flytrap closed for too long time so I bought a new pot. Unfortunately, it rained on my way home and the flytrap got wet. To my surprise, its trap didn't close when the rain fall on it. After I got home I first use water to dripping respectively on its bare trap and its sticks, it remained open. I suspected my previous guess but I still used a wooden stick to test my hypothesis, it indeed close when I touched its sticks. This result seemed show that flytraps can tell water from other things. Then I learnt that flytraps have accurate working system that makes them can avoid trapping wrongly because of the rain or others. This kind of patience and carefulness makes me be able to discover more things from normal things or situations no more than usual, which enables me learn much from the same thing.
I also like observing creatures around me. For example, when I go out with others, they always find me suddenly stop at somewhere and fix my eyes on a tree or something seemingly no more than usual, while actually, I was observing a bird or discovered some insects or just finding out something unusual on it. I pour my love in nature, thus I am also loved by nature. I once observed parent birds feeding their children; one bird flew into my sight with the fish in its mouth and the fish was disappeared among its children almost the moment the parent bird stopped at the edge of the nest. Then the bird flew away and returned after several minutes. What were waiting for it are the ever-hungry children. I kept my body unmoved, observing them for about an hour and that parent bird also kept flying into and out of my sight without resting for even a second. Looking at the ever-unsatisfied children birds always asking for food from parent bird, I found myself just like them. I, from my heart, felt I must do what within my power to repay my parents. I also deeply felt the tenacity of life from a vulnerable butterfly which bumped into a spider net but finally escaped and flying freely among the flowers though its wings were incomplete. I didn't understand some of the truth taught in class genuinely until nature taught me. I think maybe it is my original emotion that makes me appealed by emotional nature rather than the truth instilled into our mind without emotion. The teaching method now we receive is too inflexible: we learn everything from the books or pitifully few pictures. But from our feelings we can easily know that we feel the emotion, feel this world not only through the cold, boring words, but also the art, the music, the practice we ourselves carried out and many other forms. Anyhow it should be various and colorful. That's the reason why I like observing creatures around me. I It brings much fun to me and it makes me really feel life and teaches me how to learn truth of life from nature.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,797 
4780 XIN YI, essay that you wrote is not appropriate for the prompt that you chose. This is better suited for the open topic discussion that is offered as an alternative in the common app prompts. A word of advice though, don't bore the reviewer by discussing that you asked your family to describe you, that belongs to a different prompt altogether. Neither should you bore the reviewer with stories of your childhood fascinations. That is irrelevant to who you are today and does not tell him anything of value in relation to how you view yourself as a person today based upon your background, identity, or interest. That is why I am suggesting that you use the open topic prompt for this instead. I do not really get a sense of importance in relation to the various scenarios that you discussed. How do these situations relate to your chosen major? There doesn't seem to be a common denominator between the two.
Truth be told, this essay has no point. It doesn't have a direction, a clear topic for discussion, nor an idea that tells the reviewer anything of interest about you except that you like to experiment and ask questions. Which doesn't really serve a purpose when you are doing an oral interview about how you view yourself in relation to your background, identity, or interests. Even as an open topic essay, the presentation doesn't really work unless you provide your own prompt or topic title in order to help the reader understand what it is you are trying to discuss with this piece of writing.
Perhaps you would consider writing a new essay for this prompt? Or maybe, you can shorten this presentation by first deciding what it is that you want this essay to say about you. That way you can delete the irrelevant portions and create a proper prompt or thesis statement, maybe even use a relevant title that can help you make this essay more interesting and relevant to your college application.
