"Being active to opportunities is more important than your IQ and knowledge." That was my father's comment when he found out that I'd missed an application deadline.
When people find out that my father is a Tsinghua graduate and that both my parents were university professors, they start having really high expectations about me. Or simply raise their standards. It's true: I never lacked academic guidance. It is also true, however, that for a fairly long time I was taking things for granted and didn't try to use all that help that's always been available to me. I was afraid of opportunities and the changes that could follow. That was clearly the reason why I missed that deadline for application to an American high school. I also ignored most school competitions for the fear, just so I wouldn't stand out.
This aloofness, bordering on vanity, didn't allow me to develop for a great part of my life. It almost felt like there was a demon on my shoulder, always whispering words of skepticism in my ear. Every time my father encouraged me to seize an opportunity, that imaginary voice would mock the idea and tell me leave everything as it was because failure would be devastating.
It all changed one afternoon when my mom and I were trying to catch a cab in Beijing. The dazzling sun and reflecting light made it very difficult to tell if the taxis were vacant or not. I waved my hand at one taxi, but it was full, and I felt like an idiot. So I soon stopped trying. My mom, however, went really close to the road and was hailing every single cab.
It was a revelation. I immediately understood the importance of my father's advice to try and seize every opportunity around me, and how stupid I was in my reluctance to do anything about it. Later that year I got a chance to go to 9th grade in Canada. I did my best and was successful.
I felt like a frog that had just left the confines of its home puddle. The vast world of social life and opportunities was stunning, but I loved that experience. I enjoyed the reputation of a "brilliant" math student, met many new people, and went to parties and opera. It was great, and that's why I'm excited about the application process that I'm going through right now, evaluating all opportunities and trying to make the right choice. No way I'm missing another taxi!
