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Expanding my horizons at UT Austin


skbandou27 1 / -  
Nov 2, 2013   #1
Hey all, I'm a University of Houston freshman this year hoping to transfer to UT in the fall of 2014. I wrote the statement of purpose essay, and if you could write some critiques or suggestions for me that would be great! Thank you!

Prompt: The statement of purpose will provide an opportunity to explain any extenuating circumstances that you feel could add value to your application. You may also want to explain unique aspects of your academic background or valued experiences you may have had that relate to your academic discipline. The statement of purpose is not meant to be a listing of accomplishments in high school or a record of your participation in school-related activities. Rather, this is your opportunity to address the admissions committee directly and to let us know more about you as an individual, in a manner that your transcripts and other application information cannot convey.

It is May of 2004. I am only nine, and my parents persuaded me to play in my school's annual talent show. I am excited but really nervous at the same time - it is my first performance in front of a big audience. I am telling myself: "Calm down! You have rehearsed Mozart's Alla Turca a million times! This will be a breeze." Two-thirds into the piece I am feeling pretty confident and getting to the most expressive climactic part. My left hand is going down to strike the dramatic "A Major" chord, when I suddenly realize that the school keyboard is two octaves shorter than a regular piano - my wrist swings through the air past the edge of the keyboard. I froze, but somehow finished the piece on autopilot, skipping several of those "missing" chords. I was devastated and thought I would never perform on stage again.

After reflecting on this experience with my friends and family, I decided that I would not let occasional bad circumstances derail my future. Nine years and numerous concerts later, I am a much more confident person even though I still get nervous coming out on stage. I have never had a "short keyboard experience" since then, but sometimes I feel I need a couple of more octaves to fully express myself. Presently I study at the Moores School of Music at the University of Houston as a piano performance major. It is a great school and a wonderful music program, but I believe that the highly acclaimed University of Texas and Butler School of Music would enable me to expand my horizons and add those extra "octaves" to my repertoire as a musician and as a person.

Alongside music I would like to double major as a psychology major as well, because this would help me in any teaching experiences I will come across in the future - whether it be at a University teaching or private lesson setting. There are many reasons why UT Austin appeals to me, and many reasons why I am hoping to transfer there this fall. UT's Butler School of Music has a phenomenal piano performance program, with highly qualified and distinguished professors. Because I have great interest in performing in group settings and eventually potentially teaching music, the wide array of classes, ranging from chamber music to pedagogy courses is something that really sets this program apart.

In regards to my eventual second major, UT's college of Liberal Arts and Sciences has a very well regarded psychology program, ranking in the top 25 national undergraduate psychology programs. The psychology department stands out to me with its world-renowned faculty and researchers, as well as different categories of psychology including social, developmental, and neurological branches of psychology.

As a city, Austin would offer me a plethora of opportunities and experiences in pursuit of my academic and personal goals. Musically, UT Austin being the live music center of the state would provide me cultural enrichment - whether it be going to the highly praised Austin Symphony or Austin Lyric Opera on the weekends, listening to live jazz concerts in downtown, or getting internships/performing opportunities in the metropolitan area.

Aside from the academic advantages the university brings, what came to my attention were the study abroad programs and numerous student organizations. I would like to take a semester in a different country, and UT's many opportunities to study abroad would help me grow as an individual and experience new cultures. Being very interested in debate and politics, UT's political organizations on campus really appealed to me. I was excited to find out that UT has a large United Students against Sweatshops club where I hope to be able to contribute having had a leadership experience as the current vice president of University of Houston's USAS organization. Also, the diversity clubs are another plus that the University has. The fact that it is such a diverse campus, having students from many cultures would help to enrich my college experience and expand my knowledge of different traditions.

UT Austin's state of the art programs and faculty, location in an ideally metropolitan city, and incredibly diverse student body and organizations make it the optimal college for me. I hope to be accepted into UT Austin as a transfer student so that I can pursue my academic and musical goals, and so that I can surround myself with opportunities to mature culturally while at the same time persevering my hobbies and interests through the plentiful organizations that the campus has to offer.
Blastofftomars1 3 / 7 1  
Nov 5, 2013   #2
I love your introduction, it was very captivating! I like that you have done well in researching the opportunities offered at UT Austin. I would like that you express more passion in the path that you are taking. Overall it was good!


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