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'exploring the opposing interests' - Stanford letter to roommate... need to reduce length.


zkachmer 5 / 11  
Dec 29, 2011   #1
Here's what I've got. I like it so far, but it's 216 characters over the limit. I don't need it to be exactly 2000 right now, but any tips on where I could eliminate or condense would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Dear future roommate,
Congratulations to your acceptance into Stanford. Personally, I am overjoyed that such a prestigious school has chosen me to become a member of its Class of 2016, and I'm sure you feel the same way. I look forward to meeting you in person and being able to start what I'm sure will be an exciting and new relationship, but, until then, this letter will give you some insight into what I'm all about.

I like to think that I'm generally an extremely likable person. I have neither an overwhelmingly quiet nor loud demeanor, but I am friendly and social. I may come off as the jockey football player at first, since I played four years of high school football, update my fantasy sports rosters daily, and enjoy comparing numerous situations to some sort of sports scenario. However, unlike the stereotypical jock, I love to learn. Obviously, Stanford is not a place that is going around accepting students who have not proven this in some way or another, and that is one of the reasons I am so excited to be a student there. Unlike the average high school student, I look forward to the stimulation of my mind and the exploration of its abilities. Now you're probably thinking to yourself either, "Oh no, this kid's crazy" or "Oh yes, this kid is just like me." Let's hope it's the second and that our relationship as roommates will allow us to discover even more interests we share. Maybe it could be a certain musical ability (I play guitar and piano) that would enable us to have some sweet jam sessions, possibly at the risk of pushing some of our neighbors buttons. Or maybe it could be a love of food that will lead us to become hunters of the best foods on and around campus. Or maybe, we will have nothing in common but the weather (Although the constant sun and nice climate of Paolo Alto probably won't provide much to discuss on that front). This would be just as great of an experience in my opinion, because sometimes exploring the opposing interests of another is even more exciting than enjoying those that are shared.

I look forward to finally meeting you when the school year arrives, and I anticipate the next four years of our lives being ones that we will never forget.
TheN3094 4 / 16  
Dec 29, 2011   #2
I like it, its friendly and not overly friendly. In terms of reducing it I think you could probably do without this sentence "Obviously, Stanford is not a place that is going around accepting students who have not proven this in some way or another, and that is one of the reasons I am so excited to be a student there." He should know that Stanford is very prestigious and that most, if not all, the students love to learn. Also maybe you could combine some of the things you hope to have in common to shorten it a bit. Other than that its pretty good. :)

oh and congrats on being accepted! One of my friends got accepted to Stanford too; maybe he's your new roomate. haha.

PLEASE HELP ME ON MY ESSAYS THE DEADLINE IS 2 DAYS AWAY. thank youuuuuu. :D
OP zkachmer 5 / 11  
Dec 29, 2011   #3
OK yeah i think the whole love to learn thing got me a bit off track, but i wanted to contrast something with the jock stereotype thing
fishie21 3 / 17  
Dec 29, 2011   #4
(Although the constant sun and nice climate of Paolo Alto probably won't provide much to discuss on that front).

just a SMALL thing: Palo Alto :)

otherwise, its a lovely letter!


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