Unanswered [12] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 7


'eyes, ears, mouth, and nose' - Diversity Common App essay


Birdiee 6 / 35 1  
Oct 9, 2012   #1
A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.

"Repeat after me: eyes, ears, mouth, and nose," I watched as my older cousin gestured to the parts of her face in front of her English class of about ten students. I grinned as the kids repeated the words back to her and mimicked her gestures. For these students though, English was definitely not their first language: Farsi was. I was sitting in an air-conditioned classroom in Iran listening to eager students learn a new language that would open many doors for them in the future. Little did I know that this was where I would discover how my bilingual ability would help define me as a person.

Both of my parents were born in Iran and later immigrated to the United States where I was born. I learned English rather well, but at home my parents would speak Farsi as they still do today. In a few years I learned how to read, write, and speak Farsi, and within the past fourteen years I have taken two trips to Iran. Originally, those trips were just endless weeks spent in a dry, scorching hot country to visit family. In retrospect, those trips were not only family visits, but they were also opportunities to help me learn Farsi: the key to opening the door to the aspect of my life that separates me from my peers.

Before my third trip to Iran this past summer, I could only understand Farsi, but I had forgotten much of the Persian alphabet so reading and writing were definitely out. I had become so lazy with the language that I didn't really care about relearning it all. So being my stubborn self, I continued to avoid any situation that required me to do anything involving Farsi. Anyway, the language was only spoken in one country, so what harm could it do to just not learn it anymore? But that single thought was where I made my mistake.

Every person is different from the rest of the population through some personal quality from race and religion to sports and special talents. My quality is being able to understand Farsi; that is what makes me a diverse person. I personally believe that diversity is what brings out the unique qualities of a human being and opens opportunities for greater learning. One language has given me a fantastic and rare chance to discover a very different culture that many people ask me about.

I feel like the last few paragraphs need the most help...I don't know how to effectively show how I'm impacted by knowing Farsi..
OP Birdiee 6 / 35 1  
Oct 10, 2012   #2
can anyone please help me?
ylie - / 2  
Nov 1, 2012   #3
you're right in that you really need to show how you were impacted. you say it brings out unique qualities, but what? and what opportunities are you talking about? try to specify the grand statements you're making.
nalatieer 1 / 3  
Nov 25, 2012   #4
Hello! I think you have done a good job! This is a unique experience that will set you apart.
But the MSU prompt says what you would contribute to the MSU community and how this will add to the overall richness of campus life.

I think you should elaborate more on this. How can your bilingual ability contribute to MSU?
OP Birdiee 6 / 35 1  
Dec 1, 2012   #5
ok that helps, thanks :)
OP Birdiee 6 / 35 1  
Dec 28, 2012   #6
looking for more help!
Range Rover 3 / 6 2  
Dec 29, 2012   #7
Loved the visual effects. You did a lot more showing rather than telling here and that is highly important. They would be honored to have you there!


Home / Undergraduate / 'eyes, ears, mouth, and nose' - Diversity Common App essay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳