We ask that you respond to two of the topics below. Your personal statement should be no longer than 500 words or a total of 7000 characters for both statements (refer to character remaining counter below the essay). The best personal statements are not necessarily the longest ones.
2. How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?
4. What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community?
UCF essay on #2 and #4 I combined both into this essay. This is my day/night for working on college essays :) I appreciate your input!
I like to think that the apple does not fall far from the tree, when I think about who I am. I am fortunate to have a family that has strong values and beliefs and has given me unconditional love. I have grown up in a family where the philosophy is to give to others and do for others. Fifty plus years ago, my mother's great aunt, whom I am told, had no more than two nickels to rub together, made it her mission to help less fortunate children. Today, because of her hard work and efforts there is a center that serves the needs of children and adults in South Florida that have severe as well as multiple developmental disabilities. When she left this world, she left without any monetary value, but instead with love and knowing that she had enriched so many people's lives. My father as a young man started a program to assist mentally aphasic individuals in providing them job opportunities. As life would have it, my parent's paths led them together and today, they continue to serve the less fortunate whether it is with underprivileged children or children that have cancer, or multiple developmental disabilities. Giving up many weekends and holidays, my parents receive more joy in life by doing for others.
As a first grader my parents signed me up to join cub scouts since they believed in the values that scouting taught. Twelve years later, trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courtesy, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent, the Boy Scout law are characteristics that I now possess. By being part of the boy scout organization and in working towards my Eagle, my experiences have helped mold me into the person I am today. Whether it is working with children with cancer in a hospital environment, walking to raise funds for the cure of cancer, feeding the homeless, or helping a community organization through various service projects, I have gained valuable lessons from every experience. These experiences have forever changed me and I look at life from a different perspective. Earning a degree from the University of Central Florida would be a great accomplishment in my life and I realize that it will require determination and perseverance. I am ready for the challenge. I have learned to take advantage of every opportunity afforded to me, and my college experience will be no exception. My experiences with the less fortunate have taught me to continuously push myself because I respect the fact that the opportunities I have been afforded are a blessing and that my potential is limitless. From my family and through my own experiences I have learned the importance of giving back to others and the community. I will continue to give back to the Central Florida community as a student of the university and as a person of virtue. I will use my education to not only better myself, but also to further help others. As Herbert Spencer once said, "The great aim of education is not knowledge but action."
Good morning.
A few things: first, the list of characteristics is a bit ostentatious; shorten it up a bit to the most important to you. Also, I suggest a quick refresher on the use of punctuation, specifically commas. That will help the flow of the essay.
In regards to content, you use good reasons to answer the prompt and support them with detailed stories, making your essay strong. Your conclusion also fits the rest of your essay well.
Nice work.
Regards,
Gloria
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