My fascination for computers began with video games; AUBG/ broaden global perspective

Hello, this is half of my essay for applying to AUBG (as the title would suggest) and I could really use some help. It would be absolutely amazing if you could review the little I have written so far and if you could perhaps give me a few ideas (topics) on what more to write.

How an AUBG education will broaden your global perspective and cultivate your capacity for social responsibility.

Ever since I was young I've been fascinated by computers. Naturally, like most others it all began with video games, however quite soon I began to wonder - what makes a computer tick, and after grasping the basics - how is possible that a line of simple ones and zeros could result in something as complex.

Once I began my high school education I was given a proper opportunity to study computers and I must say I absolutely love it to this very day; however I felt it simply wasn't enough. Soon afterwards I began developing my other interest - I picked up a musical instrument, I became more involved in extracurricular activities and began playing baseball. I love to read so I joined the student library council and became its vice president the following academic year, and a year later its president. We have organized many fundraisers and attracted more and more readers, in the past months the TSLC even took upon the task to revive the school newspaper.

I have participated in language and various other competitions numerous times. A big part in my life played me joining the town's baseball team - not only did it turn out to be an incredible experience, but it was also then when I first heard of AUBG.

When I took a closer look into the university I found it had everything that I was looking for - a way for me to further improve my hobbies and skills, a prestigious and truly excellent education, a way to meet new people from other countries and widen my view of the world; and all of that without having to leave the country, giving me the opportunity to stay close to my family and friends. I made it a personal goal to go study at AUBG.

I removed the first punctuation which is not necessary. I think the last part should be taken into a new line because your sentence sounds a bit crowded. This is your opening sentence and it should come with a punch.



.... this idea appears suddenly and it looks a bit abrupt. You should set up a proper link between the previous sentence and this one.
You have answered a very little in respect of how AUBG would help you broaden your global perspective. I think you need to have more emphasis on that !