This is the 'describe a significant experience' one. I feel like at the moment something is missing between the third and last sentence. Any ideas? The word limit is 150, by the way.
Last year I discovered personally why my father wants so badly for me to succeed. It's because sheetrock is very, very heavy. Working with him on private construction jobs opened my back to a whole new world of pain the likes of which many a construction worker has certainly experienced before me. While lifting heavy objects does not mean I am more prepared for college academically, it does mean I have gained motivation to not flop out and fail classes, lest my back flops out on me if I'm stuck lifting bricks when I'm eighty.
its a great idea but you really need to elaborate on it
and if you go back and read common app
the minimum for its essay is 250
the 150 one is for the activities one.
so please elaborate more and it will become a really solid essay
or wait is this the short answer essay??
if so, then my bad. haha
and if so, i feel like they want to hear how you spend more time outside of school (well thats what i thought)
Oh woops I guess the title was a bit ambiguous... yeah this is the short answer one on activities/work experience
I figured the prompt said 'one' activity so i just wrote about this...
If its for the short essay, it's good enough
The word LIMIT is 150 - that means you can't go over it. With only 95 words, I think it's perfectly fine the way it is. Personally, I love it. It's short, it's snappy, and chances are the admissions officer reading your application will be so sick of the seeing same boring 150-word drivel that s/he'll be unspeakably grateful you did something different.
I think it's good. It's quick and to the point, which I suspect the adcoms will like.