Here is my personal statement. Topic is Prompt 1. I modified the name in here a bit, reducing them to capital letters only.
A Film
"Last year we could not finish it on time, remember? And last year we got a whole month." T said, accompanying his doubtful tone with a sort of 'there-is-no-hope' smile. That was how my first non-idle class meeting started.
To celebrate its anniversary, our school held a film-making contest. We had three weeks until deadline, which we initially thought would be more than enough for a 5-minute entry. But it turned out easier said than done. Our first week was wasted on discussing ideas that would be better suited for year-long projects. And our camera girl's sudden illness left us wrestling with her high-tech object and its dozens of buttons and lugs and unnamable features for the second week. As a result, before we could rejoice at footages, we realised that we had only three more days to go.
Enthusiasm flagged without saying. And I could see that from the downward eyes and frozen smiles of my classmates. Silence dominated. Here and there, whispers were the only audible sounds. 23 girls and 5 boys - I was fortunate enough not to hear any bitter criticisms. Yet I found out my class required a much more subtle monitor than I originally thought.
At least the film was not the first challenge for me this year; it was just the first official one. I was the new class monitor, or more exactly, the neeeew class monitor as what my classmates trilled had they passed me on the hall. My predecessor, A, had moved abroad and I was elected to replace her. 'Replace' - seems like a subsitute. Indeed, I heard my friends compare my inexperience to my predecessor's talents. I had a hard time persuading my classmates to go to class on time. I had been the second guy for a long time: second prizes, semi finalist, and even my legs were just the second longest in the class. So I would not be a second choice. Not this time, not ever.
My eyes moved to the ceiling. The dim, opalescent neon lights soothed me. Sometimes, I found that taking my eyes off my problems for a while could be a reasonable choice.
"Long, just relax. Let your body do the rest." D winced as he heard the fearful mixture of moanings and screechings from my flute. A shy person, he did not usually give advice, so something must have seriously gone wrong. That was the tenth-ish attempt I made trying to play the flute. My fingers stiffened. And I felt as if I was holding a bamboo trunk instead of a 500-gram, 65-centimeter long flute. 'Stiff' - people told me so as they saw me struggling with any new movements. And I knew why. I imposed excessive control on things that should not be. I did not want to go out of my way for fear that things would not go as I had calculated.
I looked at the big picture. Was I overthinking? The film was just another obstacle in my life story. So was the class monitor. Even I was just a part of it. Where it would go, I did not know. The only way to find out was, in fact, to immerse in it.
The milk-like dim soothing lights disappeared. I lowered my focus and looked at my class. Here they were - vivid fragments, each with their own personality and talent. I was surprised. Why should they depend on anyone if they could do it all by themselves? Were they like me, fear of unpredictability?
"So how about now, class monitor?" N asked, softly. Yet, her tolerant and uncannily sharp tone indicated how impatient she was.
"Let's start now." I smiled. "You may say I am over-optimistic. But we will finish in three days. And I need everyone's help."
How do you think about the story. Is it easy to follow? Does it confess any quality of mine?
Thanks for your help.
I think I got the point that you don't like to give up easily, but I had a really hard time following it. Maybe work on the transition from film project to hall monitor. My biggest problem was when you started talking about playing the flute, you completely lost me there. Work on flow and transition and you'll be okay. Best of luck to you!
