'Finance just seems to be my calling' Drexel University Application Essay

Hi guys. I'm applying to drexel university and my intended major is finance. the essay must be between 250-500 words. The prompt goes:

All other applicants: You may write about why you are interested in your choice of major, or you may write on any subject you choose.

Any suggestions or help will be greatly appreciated. thanks.

During the summer of 2010, it was time to choose my classes for my sophomore year of high school. Without really knowing what I wanted to do after I graduated high school, I chose a large variety of courses that might be able to spark a few interests of mine. I picked classes like highway safety, graphic communications, and French. All of these were good classes to take but really didn't interest me all that much. However, two of the other electives I picked were marketing and business administration. I found these classes hugely beneficial. I had never really known much about the business world prior to taking the classes but I remained engaged and interested until the very end. I learned a lot and, during my junior year, elected to take an accounting/money management course to enhance my business knowledge. It was here that I began to develop a strong fascination with the finance world, specifically the stock market. There was just something about investments and economics that I really enjoyed. Eventually I began to trade shares of stock in the real world and even today, follow those investments closely. Being a senior now, I've really been committed to learning as much about the finance world as I can. Since taking accounting, I have taken personal finance and have even decided to broaden my knowledge in economics. Finance just seems to be my calling. It's something that I love to do and something that I intend on pursuing in the future.

Hi :) You have a nice solid essay here. Well done! I have a few ideas that may help, and some suggestions on changes, although these are minor things, your essay is great the way it is-- nice writing skills!

All of these were good classes to take but really didn't interest me all that much.
"Maybe say it like this: I learned a lot from these classes but..."

However, two of the other electives I picked were marketing and business administration.
You could say: "My two favorite classes were electives- marketing and..."

I found these classes hugely beneficial.
Or say it like this: "These classes made a significant impact on me."

It was here thatAt that time, I began to develop a strong fascination with the finance world, specifically the stock market.

Being a seniorNow that I am a senior , I've really been seriously committed to learning as much about the finance world as I can.