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My first sketch - Architecture University

cruellapoisonz 1 / 2  
Sep 11, 2022   #1

My first sketch

Years after my family recovered from an electrical fire in our home, we were confronted with a heavy flood that shook parts of the city. I should be 12 years old at that time, and even if I didn't understand why adults were so moved, it was the first time that I thought about how important a good structure could be.

Living in the biggest state in Brazil (Amazonas) and being the one so rich with history and nature made me someone who feels very lucky, even if people refer to it as a state with slow urban progress, which I can also confirm. But since I noticed his potential to have a future city reference, I felt a huge desire to be part of this change in stride. However, I don't want to get stuck in the regional culture or the prospects of a private university, I want to expand my knowledge in places that met the criteria and may your culture make me see other ways. It was so much research that I found out about South Korea and its urbanization process. I can say that he enchanted me with many things: among them his concept of preserving history in technological space and his harmony with nature.

The 8 months I spent at a private university was very valuable to me, I was to have the chance to recognize my stereotypes about the role of the architect in life and society. The exercises I did and the places I visited helped me see the needs of my city: be it the regularity of the soil or a favourable structure for our climatic condition. It was there that I found one of the most important teachers to me, he always supported and encouraged me to overcome my limits.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,879 4563  
Sep 11, 2022   #2
Is this a GKS-U personal statement essay? If so then the writer is not on the right track in response to the prompt questions. The partial essay posted here is only focused on the motivations by which the student is applying for the course and nothing more. It takes up more than half the page allotment already but does not contain a properly balanced motivational reference.

The motivation to study in South Korea is so generalized and short, it could be used to describe any country and university. A more in-depth discussion is required. The same goes for the academic background. Where are the accomplishments as a student that would show a relevant academic foundation?

I have to give an incomplete review at this point since the essay provided is also incomplete.
OP cruellapoisonz 1 / 2  
Sep 15, 2022   #3

Sketch 2 - GKS-U Personal Statement

Years after my family recovered from an electrical fire in our home, I was confronted with a severe flood that shook parts of the city. I was 12 years old, and even though at that time I didn't understand the commotion of adults, it was the first time I thought about how important a structure could be.

I was already connected with the school's arts and drawing group in elementary school, so when I wasn't studying, drawing or participating in scholarly events, I watched Korean dramas. I loved seeing and revisiting the same novels such as "Playful Kiss", but what I loved most was the structures of the environment in each scene. The soft tones of the walls and the harmony of the modern style with nature brought me an inexplicable feeling, so I found myself completely obsessed with the feeling that the houses, buildings and interior areas conveyed. It was unlike anything I had in my reality. Even though I was new, I had already decided then that I would know about this country at any cost. I always knew that not everything would be as bright as the series, but it still captivated me. But, I was just a kid, I decided to just focus on school events until I got older.

Because I was participatory, I was provided with some community services during high school, but the most memorable was the donation of foods and clothings to indigenous communities, where I was in charge of collecting and organizing the boxes that would be sent. Another was the first semester I spent at a private university, where we were tasked with making a home for stray animals with recyclable materials. This not only brought me personal satisfaction, but also made me recognize the needs of my region.

Although I didn't finish it, the 5 months I spent at Centro Universitário do Norte (UNINORTE) was useful for my familiarization with the area, where I could learn about Artistic Drawing, Aesthetics, Profession and Career, Personal Development and Workability and mainly Geometry, applied by the teacher who brought me the most improvement and supported me from the beginning to apply for this scholarship. In most of his works, I sought to enhance Korea at its base, featuring the National Museum of Korea, for example. After that, I represented inspiration from a traditional South Korean house in a project, the Hanok.

Currently, I have studied Technical Design, Environmental Comfort and Building Techniques on my own; everything I'm most interested in for now. I have also dedicated myself to studying the Korean language as I have perfected my English, even though I got used to the language from a very young age.

My interest in this scholarship goes beyond sensitive reasons, but also because it is the only one that offers the opportunity to enjoy a country that I like in every way, with teaching methodologies and curriculum that I consider the best to learn. South Korea has a lot to be a reference for my country, as much as in its advanced level of urbanization, but for the quality standard of housing civilians, regardless of their financial condition. This is one of the many things I would like to learn from this country, adapt and mirror in Brazil. Honestly, I feel that if I hadn't come across Korean architecture maybe I wouldn't be as passionate about this area as I am now.

I have been preparing myself not only to be a beneficiary of the scholarship but to be a student who brings his knowledge from the country she comes from, sharing it with the natives and creating another bridge between us. With metal beams, of course.

(I feel that the information about my accomplishments is very synthetic, but I have no idea how to add more paragraphs with a fluid idea... What do you think?)

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