FIT portfolio essay evaluating how I take criticism

Provide an example of when your point of view differed from a teacher or employer during an evaluation of your performance.

How did you handle the situation?

In my junior year of band I started as the 2nd to last 2nd chair flute. In the beginning of the year my instructor told the flutes that we had to audition for them to prove that we could play the piccolo, which is similar in keys and technique to the flute, but you must know how to use the right mouth position, airflow, and patience to produce the key shrill sound from a piccolo. When I had taken my auditions I was nervous as usual because I always aim to be the best in a fields that I take on. After my evaluation my instructor told me that I can play the proper notes but my airflow sounds strained. I personally thought I did well and I didn't hear any difference in airflow I produced compared to those who passed the audition, but I know that my instructors have been in the music industry longer than I have so it's best if I trust their critique. Being told that my art is less than what it could be never fails to put a fire beneath me. Later that day and from then on I'd practice only playing in the highest register on my flute in preparation for making a proper piccolo sound. I'd discover the difference between my sound and the sound of those who passed audition and professional players and apply that to better my technique. I went on to perfect my vibrato too which makes the sound I create more beautiful and skillful. Eventually I used what I learned to work my way up to very 1st chair and the group of 1st chair flutes had the opportunity to play piccolo after one of the girls got transferred to another school. I used the power of words to thank them for giving me professional instruction and inspiration to become better than they thought I was and to explain my process which got me to be able to create the sound I was about to present to them. After my evaluation they went on to tell me how much I have improved and overshadowed most of the current piccolos by having vibrato down. I was s o grateful but I knew I wouldn't stay good without learning different ways to practice so I kept on.

Airianna, the essay is good, but lacks an initial reaction response regarding the very moment that your piccolo playing was not perfect. It Is that instant and instinctive reaction that would give this essay more life. That would allow the reviewer to understand the way that you handle rejection, and how you protect yourself from it. The essay that you wrote is too studied, to clean, too much the depiction of a perfect student. That is a studied and carefully calculated response that, although we all know the reviewer would appreciate reading, isn't the reality of the situation.

The response needs to show your initial feelings and response. Was it anger? Was it embarrassment? Did you question the critique? Did you try tor reason out? Or did you lick your wounds, go home for a good cry and then work on getting better at your craft? Show your human side, not the side that you know the reviewer would like to read about. Remember, he is assessing you through this written interview. Be honest, give the essay life. Don't be a one dimensional character when the situation obviously calls for a 3 dimensional response.

The reviewer will not take it against you if you had an initial angry reaction. It would help him understand how well you channel your anger or disappointment towards your self-improvement. Bring the essay to life with characterizations. Bring your distinctive nature to the front to help the reviewer understand who you are emotionally and how you handle disappointment and critiques.

Woah you're definitely right! I was just trying super hard to sum everything up because the word limit was 250 even though I was way over that😅 but thank you a ton, I'll for sure put more into how the rejection felt!