Also, change "because I regarded the original Chinese dishes were the best" to "because i regarded the original Chinese dishes as the best."
"so as not to disappoint him" is fine, keep it the way it was. I think Liebe's correction of it sounds more awkward.
Yea. My suggestion may have been awkward because I was working on an already awkwardly expressed sentence.
I think it IS necessary. It's a unique analogy that makes the essay stand out.
It is not as much an analogy as it is just a quotation. It's usefulness is highly debatable. Also, inserting quotations in essays has become rather lame in my opinion.
Well, UM is NOT expecting you to have experienced every culture in their prompt. Very, very few students will have met people from every part of the world. In your case, having met people from different parts of Asia gives you cultural maturity a lot of people don't have, and I think this was a perfect example for you to use in your essay. Even if you had met other cultures, it would take too long to explain. This is the right topic for a short essay.
^Yes, UM is not expecting this at all.
In my case? Actually I have met all of these ethnic groups and not just people from different parts of Asia. Unless, you were referring to tiantian lawlzz
Anyways, sentences like these really 'annoyed me':
'Now, no matter where I go, I always serve as a cultural ambassador that assimilates the essence of every civilization and combine them with my own background.'
^Just because tiantian has seen five other Asian countries, does that mean that she can go to Saudi Arabia, or Finland, and serve as a cultural ambassador? No.
I do agree with you that this experience can offer 'cultural maturity', but unlike you, I think most people do have it. You see Indian and Chinese people everywhere; they are ubiquitous ;). Tiantian has not said what the other four ethnic groups were, but I presume that these ethnic groups are also found in most of the countries abroad.
Like I said earlier, I fail to see how meeting with five other kids from five other Asian countries, and eating a dumpling with a bit of curry and an English drink (which is not even Asian, therefore is not a sample of any of those Asian kid's culture) allows tiantian to think that she is so multicultural. I just think her claims are a bit too bold. That is all.