Hi, i am wondering if this is an appropriate response. Feedback is much appreciated!
TELL US ABOUT WHO YOU ARE
I am proud of the fact that I am resilient. Having a competitive mindset faced me with many hardships. Thus, showing myself being brought down wont stop me from getting back up. I have always shown myself to people as a calm person who wants to listen and help people, rather than try to fix my own problems. My friends and family knowing me more closely know I can get through whatever I am challenged with, and come out on the other side even better.
For instance, I began playing football when I was in grade 10. Beginning a sport like football this late put me at an extreme disadvantage, but this issue did not discourage me. On the contrary, it motivated me. I was considered very undersized for my position, however, I gave it my all every day at practice to have a respected place on the team. Furthermore, I advanced at a very fast rate throughout the season and it was recognized by my coaches and teammates, but I didn't feel I was finished. I continued pushing myself to my limits through all of the pandemic. Hence, when I returned for my final season I could see the work I was putting in finally paying off. On the whole, I was awarded Defensive MVP on my team, and named Conference All-Star for my division.
Reflecting on many scenarios throughout my life clearly demonstrated my resilience to me. I am glad this is a strength I am armed with because I know that whatever comes at me I can get past.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 12,308 3991
There are two things that the reviewer will be looking for when he reads the response to the questions posed. The first consideration will be the possible leadership qualities that the applicant may have based on the observation of other people. Why will the reviewer be looking for this in the applicant? He would like to consider the independence of the applicant and his sense of community in the process. Do the people around the person see any leadership traits ( as a son/daughter, friend, student, or during an extra curricular activity engagement) that would make him an asset to the student community? How was this displayed? Hence the "How would your family friends, and or members of your community describe you?" question.
The second consideration will be the substance of the response. Does the observation reflect a positive character that may contribute something of value to the student community? This is where the marked "What you are most proud of" reference comes in. As a person who is seen as a leader by most of his peers, what accomplishment would highlight this sense of respect for the character of the person? How does it bring the character discussion full circle?
The current essay does not really consider the reference questions in relation to what the reviewer will be on the lookout for in an applicant. While there are no right or wrong answers, the more character driven the response, the better the reviewer will get to know you and, the more competitive your application will be when compared to other applicants.