Prompt: What are the unique qualities of Emory University, and the specific school(s) to which you are applying (Emory College of Arts and Sciences, Oxford College, or both), that make you want to become part of Emory University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?
Growing up in Georgia Emory was often heard in passing and when my senior year of high school came around I started to hear Emory more and more. As a naive 17 year old I through Emory on the back burner because I only wanted to apply to schools that had well-known football programs because I thought that was what I wanted, academics although important stood equal with my desire for Saturday college football games. I did not even bother to apply to Emory and upon starting college in the fall I realized how quickly my interest in the college football atmosphere dwindled and immediately began searching for something more. I had already started to change my mind about my major and started looking for schools that had strong psychology and business programs as I was deciding between the two. Suddenly Emory appeared in the back of my mind and I started to research the institution. I took a virtual tour online and started to fall in love with the beautiful campus and gorgeous marble buildings. As if I was not already head over heels I looked into their undergraduate psychology program and could barely contain myself when I saw they offered something my school did not, a joint major in psychology and linguistics. Emory was giving me an offer I could not refuse, my heart was set into studying psychology and I had been looking for another major that would complement it and I had found that and an inviting community all at Emory. I called my fellow classmate from high school who is currently attending Emory and asked him about the school and what he told me made realize I needed to be here. The class sizes were small and there were countless opportunities that would be presented to me from the knowledgable and caring professors, the Woodruff library, and the writing center to the city of Atlanta encompassing Emory just waiting to be explored. On top of that having traveled in the past the diverse student body would create the perfect atmosphere for me to thrive not only academically but socially. There is no doubt in my mind that Emory University gives all of itself to its students and I cannot help but feel as though I am missing out the longer I wait to attend this fine establishment.
Does it stick to the prompt?
Suggestions to make it better?
I need to get accepted as a transfer it has become my dream so please help make it a reality!
definitely need some commas throughout. read it aloud and whenever you pause, add a comma because you are missing a lot. this may be just me, but I would admit how immature/regrattable it was that you would apply to a college for the college football games.
wait you said i should admit it or not? im confused. and i will fix the essay comma problems
Prompt: What are the unique qualities of Emory University, and the specific school(s) to which you are applying (Emory College of Arts and Sciences, Oxford College, or both), that make you want to become part of Emory University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?
COMPLETELY REDONE!
An even balance between classroom education and field research is not always easy to come by as a psychology major, yet it is offered at Emory year after year. The Emory College of Arts and Sciences not only offers degrees in Psychology and Linguistics, which are both interests of mine, but a joint major program that sets it apart from any other school in the south. The program offers an education in both fields and a connection between the two that may not have been expressed if I just double majored. The academics offered at Emory are a cut above the rest and it does not stop there. The Psychology department in the College of Arts and Sciences has multiple research opportunities that I want to immerse myself in year round. The SIRE Program that is offers extensive research opportunities to undergraduates during the academic year and in the summer. With the research that Emory offers I can get a hands on experience in psychological research and have a more complete understanding of my major. In addition I am not limited to one research program a year and that is so important to me because I am enthusiastic to learn and the more experience I can get the better. Emory offers the intellectual experience that I want my college years to consist of and I do not see me getting the same opportunities anywhere else. No other university has such a strong sense of balance in education in and outside of the classroom and that is a quality that separates the Eagles from any other bird. I know I am missing out by not attending Emory University and in my heart I know I am meant to not just fly but soar.
PLEASE ANY COMMENTS OR CORRECTIONS TO MAKE THIS BETTER!!!
What's the word count requirement on this?
Also, when's it due?
I like it! Two things though: A. As a high school senior freshly done with college apps herself, I have always seen "Why X Colleges?" include some non-academic features to their answer, so I can't verify what final impression this will make, although you certainly come across as very enthusiastic and passionate about Psychology!
Also, B. The prompt is asking for qualities. I don't know if that's the same as "things they have", versus "the atmosphere of the place". If need be, I'm sure you could work in something about how going to Emory has a freeing (interdisciplinary major) and daring (research, high academic standard) that feels like flying for your Eagle metaphor.
