Please leave your comment on my essay. Suggest some correction, if possible.
Also, deadline of Feb 1 means by feb 1 or b4 that?
How did u first hear about our college and y did u choose to apply?
To be well acquainted with the admission process in the US, the first thing I did after my final exams was to visit USEF (United States Educational Foundation) Nepal. In the Friday session, the advisors described to us the process of application step by step, the first of which was to search and choose colleges. After attending the Friday session, I went directly to the library on the ground floor. There, on the wall, I saw some flags of US Colleges and Universities. A blue flag in the first row caught my attention. It read Franklin and Marshall College. I asked for permission to use a library computer and started exploring that college. From that day, I have explored the college nicely and have found it a great fit for me. F and M was the first and the best college I found. Therefore, choosing to apply there was not a difficult decision for me.
Franklin and Marshall College, as I know it now, is a vibrant intellectual community. The primary factor for my wanting an education at F and M is its academic excellence. The rigorous academics and engaging faculty members in a "small class" will help me reach my full potential. I will be able to interact closely with my professors and learning will be fun. By learning more about the college's strong commitment to liberal education, I came to believe that its focus on the overall development of students is the most appealing factor of an F and M education. The Curriculum strikes me as unique. No doubt, it will help me to develop my critical thinking. That especially appeals to me. An F and M education will provide me with self-mastery as well as an experience that will shape my future life (personal as well as professional). I not only believe but also know that the college will prepare me to be a future leader and a responsible citizen of a global community.
Throughout my life, I have aspired to become a theoretical physicist. I cannot help but have an interest in probing the deepest problems of physics. The extensive undergraduate research opportunities at F and M will help me in my courses. Interacting so closely with the most talented and engaging professors and students from around the globe will certainly broaden the horizon of my thinking. This is what I long for. There will be people who can understand my ideas. There will be a delicious exchange of ideas between us which will lead to a great concoction of new ideas. Here on the other side of the world I lean back and daydream about it. The opportunity to do independent research and work with the professors in their research and help co-author professional papers is what I have desired for a long time. This will add an extra dimension to classroom learning. This will also help me learn good lab practices.
Another important factor that led me to choose F and M as a best fit college is the diversity of experience that I will get there. The big resources available to complement the classroom learning will give me a real life experience. As I am interested in various aspects of science, from astrophysics and quantum mechanics to its engineering aspect, the facilities available in all these fields appeals to me. The co-operative degree engineering program with reputed universities also strikes me as very inviting. Facilities available in astrophysics such as the NURO, Majors Lounge, Beowulf Cluster and the Astronomy Research Lab will help me pursue my interest in engaging in extensive research. They will also help me explore astrophysics as a career interest.
I can see fantastic opportunities waiting for me at F and M. The excellent undergraduate research opportunities and talented faculty will uncover the latent talent in me to foster my desire to be a future scientist and contribute significantly to the mankind's development. It will be a once-in-a-life-time experience. Given the opportunity to study there, I will happily make the supreme effort to wring the last drop of goodness out of every opportunity I get. And I will be able to fulfill my desire to be a future physicist.
Use dots for U.S. instead of US
This first para seems to take a long time to make its point. I'll try to pack it tighter:
To be well acquainted with the admission process in the US, The first thing I did after my final exams was to visit the United States Educational Foundation in Nepal. In the Friday session, the advisors described to us the process of application step by step, the first of which was to search and choose colleges. After attending the Friday session, I went directly to the library on the ground floor. There, on the wall, I saw some flags of US Colleges and Universities. A blue flag in the first row caught my attention. It read Franklin and Marshall College. I asked for permission to use a library computer and started exploring that college. From that day, I have explored the college nicely and have found it a great fit for me. F and M was the first and the best college I found researched. Therefore, choosing to apply there was not a difficult decision for me.
Now it's a little less tedious to read. With all the details, the reader can get overwhelmed.
I see that the whole essay is written very well, but like many good writers you use too many words! Revise for conciseness. :-)
