Unanswered [9] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 5


Frog. Deefrog. Froggy. UVA Essay: Favorite Word (Odd but unique essay) (250 words)


DeepakG 1 / 1  
Nov 30, 2016   #1
Frog. Deefrog. Froggy. While others have sensibile nicknames that relate to their given names, my close friends prefer to refer to me as an small amphibious animal.

What began as a light hearted tease quickly transformed into an endearing nickname. Frog is not a nickname in the sense that it has replaced my name but instead is used by my close friends in moments of excitement or to show affection in a humorous way.

Random encounters with my friends at school or at the mall are met with exclamations of some variation of "frog" instead of a normal hi or hello. Although this moniker may seem illogical as it has no relation to me or my name, over time it has gained a meaning. This nickname has dispersed from my close group of friends to people I barely know who excitedly call me frog upon seeing me.

My constant excitement and energy is referred to as "hopping around like a frog". I am a very enthusiastic about small things such as planning a trip or having with my friends. Constant laughter often accompanies this enthusiasm which is known as my never-ending "ribetting". This unique name symbolizes the one of a kind, light hearted relationship I have with my few close friends. It represents the fact that I am a good listener as frogs have excellent hearing. On the surface this nickname seems odd and nonsensical but it stands for much more than that.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Nov 30, 2016   #2
Deepak, you have written a pretty engaging essay. However, you have the paragraphs misplaced. You should open with the description of your character (Hopping around like a frog) and the unique personality that the name symbolizes within you. That way, when you go into the explanation as to why earned the moniker from your friends, it has a more personal connection to you. If you opt to present the statement in my suggested manner, you will not need the hanging paragraph at the start of the essay. It doesn't really help the response to move forward whether in the original form or in my suggested one. It is actually a redundant statement because you already explain the same thing within the other 2 paragraphs, in a more interesting manner. So you can take it out without affecting your actual response. You don't need to meet the maximum word count. Just make sure you are not under the word count in your final version and your statement response will be alright.
OP DeepakG 1 / 1  
Dec 1, 2016   #3
@Holt
Thanks for your detailed reply! I understand your edit and I agree that makes the essay more personal. Do you advice ending the essay with the second to last paragraph, Random encounters with my friends at school or at the mall are met with exclamations of some variation of "frog" instead of a normal hi or hello. Although this moniker may seem illogical as it has no relation to me or my name, over time it has gained a meaning. This nickname has dispersed from my close group of friends to people I barely know who excitedly call me frog upon seeing me., or to write a separate conclusion for the essay?
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Dec 1, 2016   #4
Deepak, I believe that you should write a new conclusion for your essay. A separate paragraph that shows how you are affected by your unique nickname. There are some people who are not receptive to the monikers that they are given by their friends and family. However, you seem to have a different mindset regarding your nickname. So it would be nice to read about how you first reacted to learning about the nickname and why you reacted that way. Basically, the conclusion show how proud you are to wear the nickname and that the name you were given has only helped you develop a unique mindset or how it helped you develop to become the person you are today.
sleepycorndogs 3 / 5 5  
Dec 1, 2016   #5
...my close friends preferchoose to refer to me as an small, slimy amphibious animal.

... it has replaced my name.but insteadRather, it is used by my (...) of excitement or to show affection in a humorous way.as a humorous sign of their affection.

...it has gained a deeper meaning.

...havingsocializing with my friends.

Constant lLaughter often accompanies....

...symbolizes the one of a kindone-of-a-kind...

It represents the fact that I am a good listener ...(I'd personally either cut this out completely or move it to earlier in the essay where you're still explaining why people call you frog)

Other than those few grammar and style things, Nice essay, Frog!


Home / Undergraduate / Frog. Deefrog. Froggy. UVA Essay: Favorite Word (Odd but unique essay) (250 words)
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳