"Funny Girl" - I just am who I am, for better or worse. Emerson College - Life Title Essay

Question:
Much of the work that students do at Emerson College is a form of storytelling. If you were to write the story of your life until now, what would you title it and why? Please be brief (100-200 words).

My Response:
Funny Girl
I'm not Barbra Streisand. I'm not even Jewish! But, my whole life, I've always been known as the "funny girl" to everyone I know. It has it's pros and cons, but is an honor that I wear proudly. Being the "funny girl" was always a great thing in elementary school. Everyone wanted to be my friend, and my teachers thought I was a free spirit. Parents always talked about how outgoing I was, and they loved my spunk. In middle school, students and teachers didn't appreciate my humor anymore. I went from being funny to being somewhat of a class clown, and many people were annoyed by my wild pre-teen antics and musings about Justin Bieber. I started trying to impress people with jokes, but got the exact opposite result. Middle school taught me that if you try too hard to be a certain kind of person, the exact opposite might happen. Instead of trying so hard to fit into this identity as the "funny girl", I just am who I am, for better or worse.

Laura, there is no need to reference Barbara Streisand in your statement. Nor is it necessary to explain the reference. I appreciated your statement more when I got past the part about Barbara and the reference to Jews. As you know religion is a socially explosive topic in the United States at the moment so it's best that you don't reference religion at all. Most specially when you end it the way you said it. It could come across in a negative manner to the reviewer. Remember, you are not sure if the reviewer is Jewish. Don't say anything that could possibly offend people. Err on the cautious side :-)

If you listen to me and you decide to remove the aforementioned lines, here is what I would like you to do. Come up with sentences depicting how you felt when people first started calling you a funny girl. Did you have any emotions behind it the first few times you were called a funny girl? What made you embrace the nickname? Why do you wear the name proudly?

Overall, it is a very good response to the essay. It does not miss or skip a beat and offers a clear depiction of who you are beyond the other aspects of the essay prompts. The only room for improvement is the reference I made above. Good luck with your application :-)

I liked that. In my opinion, It would be better if you added more about your internal feelings.