"to further develop my interest in Chemical Engineering" - Why Northwestern?

Hello, I am applying to Northwestern and have answered their supplement prompt on the common app, which is as follows:

What are the unique qualities of Northwestern - and of the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying - that make you want to attend the University? In what ways do you hope to take advantage of the qualities you have identified?

Here is my response:

I first learned about Northwestern University from an ambitious French friend of mine, who also dreams of one day attending. At the time his suggestion glanced off of me, as I knew little about which university I wanted to attend in the future. However, as I became more aware of the future, I realized the time for applications had come, so I began researching this university of which I had heard so long ago. In my long search of potential colleges, Northwestern has come out on top due to its outstanding reputation and opportunities for participation in research. The McCormick School of Engineering and Applied Science is especially ideal, as it will give me the chance to study with the best there is in terms of students and it will also offer me the hands-on experience I need for my future.

The McCormick School of Engineering is exactly what I feel I need to further develop my interest in Chemical Engineering. What is even more appealing about the school's Department of Chemical and Biological Engineering is the chance to receive a certificate in Biochemical Engineering, another field in which I am very interested. The school provides the materials I will need as a graduate as well as a professional. The skills I will pick up in the department will be vital to my success in the wide field of Chemical Engineering.

Research opportunities are abundant in Northwestern University as well as in the McCormick School of Engineering. The Research Experience for Undergraduates programs are an excellent option to further my skills individually and explore my field more thoroughly. Internships will also help to cement my career further and provide a beautiful combination of classroom learning and actual experience. The chance to study abroad is also very important to me because I must be ready to experience international study as many employers start to span the globe.

My decision of which university to attend has been made easy thanks to Northwestern University and the McCormick School of Engineering. They both offer benefits and advantages vital to my future. In order to get the best out of my education, the hands-on education at Northwestern is exactly what I need.

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Do I have the right idea? Feedback in any form is greatly appreciated.

Hey, Rob! Thanks for your quick reply on my essay. Here's what I have to say about yours:

"who also dreams of attending, one day "
"glanced off of me" < I've never heard that phrase o_O It threw me off. Do you want to use something else?

The rest of the essay is very fluid in my mind :)

At the same time, you should try to be more specific. To be honest, this could be written again, with every mention of NU and McCormick replaced with another college (I'm pretty sure a lot of colleges offer a minor, certificate, or double major with Chem and Biochem Engineering). Talk about specific programs! Professors! Classes! It'll make this much better.

Good job so far, though. And good luck from a fellow NU McCormick applicant ;)