Hi, here is my essay to apply to the engineering faculty of University of Toronto, I would like to know if you have some critics about it before I submit it :)
What has inspired you to pursue an engineering degree and why would you like to study at the University of Toronto?
What skills have you developed through your extra-curricular experiences that will support your future success as both a student and an engineer?
--> Nowadays, technology and innovation are in the heart of our society ; the art of crafting new things is evolving and will continue evolving... There are many ways to make our everyday lives better while respecting our planet of course, and I want to be part of this evolution. It is this view of our world that fed my desire of studying engineering.
I very often ask myself of the ways our civilization had evolved from caverns to immense skyscraper and incredible bridges, from a rock on the top of a wood stick to a portable phone able to get access to all the information you need... At the end of this year I will finish High-school and I want to go further ; I want to add my own part to the evolution of technologies, to finally apply what I learned in math or physics to real life. Studying engineering will help me to do what I really want, create and innovate.
In High-school I acquired skills and developed them and they'll help me to succeed. Out-school, I always loved doing sports, reading or drawing in my free time, this is only for my amusement but I developed some skills by myself ; I also lead some teams in volley-ball or basketball, this allowed me to acquire good leader skills. I've always participated to every kind of activities that presented to me... I have the ability to adapt my way of thinking to the situation to make good choices... If it is needed I can learn and improve my knowledge in a topic very quick and can easily explain it to other persons, I am perfectly able to make someone understand my points or accepting that I'm wrong. I also did painting on ceramics for 2 years and it taught me to be meticulous and patient. I feel that these skills would allow me to perfectly integrate a team and make any job done well.
Since I am child my bookshelf has always been full of science books or magazines, I love to get informed about technologies and science and when something catches my attention, I am able to read about for hours, so I acquired a significant amount of knowledge about random topics...
Next year I'll have a chance to come to live in Toronto and I want to grab this chance ; some friends from Canada highly recommended me University of Toronto and after looking on the web, becoming a student of your university has become a dream ; I feel that U of T would be the best choice to pursue my engineering degree, with the company of all your students and professors ; I feel that I'll find exactly what I need to become a successful engineer...
Thanks for your help :)
Nowadays, technology and innovation are in the heart of our society
... wish if you say this a bit differntly;
Nowadays, technology and innovation are the most influential things in youth behavior.It is this view of our world that fed my desire of studying engineering.
It is this view that eventually got developed into a great passion of mine for Engineering.In High-school I acquired skills and developed them and they'll help me to succeed.
.... this is not very strong :(
Since I am child my bookshelf has always been full of science books or magazines,
Since my childhood, I was an avid reader and my bookshelf was always covered with science fictions and magazines.You mean what I think of your essay overall? Overall, I think it's a solid essay that's really clear and well-written, but you need to be more specific about what made you want to become an engineer and why you want to go to the University of Toronto.
