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Georgetown University Creative Application Essay

katev 18 / 120 24  
Nov 1, 2012   #1
Here is the prompt: As Georgetown is a diverse community, the Admissions Committee would like to know more about you in your own words. Please submit a brief essay, either personal or creative, which you feel best describes you.

It was one of our exploration days during our summer study program and we had only a few hours to roam the city of Nantes, France. While I had the chance, I gathered a few of my peers to search for a bakery. This is a natural compulsion of mine, this urge to find the nearest or the best bakery in a new place. This impulse is driven partly by my strong sweet tooth, but more so by my love of baking. As we scanned the passing windows in the hopes of finding a bakery, my friends brought up one French pastry that I was surprised to find I had never made or tried: a macaron. I was told that these dainty, pastel-colored confections melt in your mouth upon tasting the two light, meringue cookies filled with a smooth buttercream. Being an avid baker and having never had a macaron before, I was determined to try one while we were in the home of the macaron. Upon discovering a small store that made these colorful confections, I was quick to try one. I soon found that these were well worth the hunt, as I fell in love at first bite. When our course ended and we returned back to Memphis, I knew that I would have to try making them. My peers and my mother warned me to not try making a batch, as these were one of the most difficult desserts to make. However, I am an ambitious person and was confident in my baking ability, so I decided to make them anyway. Upon searching for a recipe, my peers' warnings were confirmed. Every article I read warned me of the disastrous and impossible tendencies the macaron. I was told that I would need to take a course and read countless books in order to perfect this tiny, harmless cookie. After grinding my own flour, cracking dozens of eggs, and popping every last air bubble I found in the shells of these cookies, I was left with fifty macarons roughly four hours later. The process was grueling, but I had defeated the infamous macaron. Some might wonder, what is so special about this dessert? If one can easily make chocolate chip cookies that can also satisfy a sweet tooth, why spend so much time and put in so much work to make this one kind of pastry? I have come to realize that the challenge of baking this notorious confection and the delicious result are what make them worth all of the effort. I have been baking since I was four years old and I am always looking for something new to try or a way to improve. From stirring the batter with a precise technique for an exact number of times and baking them at just the right temperature, this challenging dessert takes a certain level of dedication that I put into everything I do. To put all of that hard work into something and to get something so great as an end result is such a gratifying experience. I have learned to apply this mindset to all of my endeavors, academic or not. I firmly believe that one can have all of the tools necessary to succeed, but she must fully dedicate herself in order to succeed.

sleepyizme - / 4  
Nov 1, 2012   #2
You chose a good topic to write about, and this essay has a lot of potential to be great. However, your essay is mostly tell and not enough show. Start off with a more captivating introduction, something that will make the admissions officer want to read on. Also, I see a lot of phrases being repeated throughout this essay-- specifically "try one" and "try making." This repetition and the objective way you describe some things makes parts of the essay bland and hard to get through (like oatmeal!). I want to see more sentences that sound like this: "I had defeated the infamous macaron"

I do like the way you connect this baking experience with how you are as a person. It shows consistency and tells Georgetown what you do outside of school.
rezwan3 7 / 19 4  
Nov 1, 2012   #3
*When I got the chance
Soccer13 2 / 4  
Nov 22, 2012   #4
The introduction needs a little bit of work, but I really like the whole idea. I think you need to jump to the macaron right away instead of ellaborating on the summer study progam

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