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Global society, maximization of benefits - UT Honors program essay


bully 5 / 1  
Oct 29, 2008   #1
This essay is still pretty rough... just hoping I answered the question correctly and completely. (Sorry, it's pretty long... the requirement is at least 1,000 words)

Prompt: Select one of the following: literature and the arts, politics and business, science and technology. Discuss one specific aspect of its importance in current global society, including benefits and problems. How would you promote and develop this specific aspect to maximize its benefit to society? Indicate what you believe the financial costs and staffing needs would be for implementation of your proposal over the first five years.

Global society entails a need for scientific advancement. Communication, disease control, and environmental preservation require advances for the quality of life to increase universally. Disease control is top priority since an outbreak can yield human death. Alternative energy, the space program, and other concerns are important; yet, disease control saves human life. Prevention of diseases that have not been contracted yet could avert a new age plague from happening. Disease affects all people living on Earth; thus, progress in the control of disease would dramatically increase the standards of living. One way to prevent or at least decrease disease is to raise awareness of zoonosis- the transfer of disease from an animal to a human being. Furthermore, the study of zoonosis would reduce the probability of a new virus from breaking out.

Uncivilized tribes tend to hunt animals viewed as unconventional in the western hemisphere to serve as food, such as primates. A majority of native people are oblivious to the possible spread of disease, not because they are ignorant; rather, they have a history of living this way. Educating indigenous people or forcing them to hunt in different ways could adversely affect their way of life. The study of animals with possible zoonotic diseases that are hunted by tribal people may hinder their ability to get adequate food, resulting in malnutrition. In most cases, natives do not have a need for understanding, a fear of global spread of disease, nor an incentive to cooperate. The way they live has worked for hundreds of years. Why should they change now? Forced cooperation in such a study could result in a loss of history and could affect hunting patterns leading to a famine. However, a tribe's ability to hunt for their food rightfully could cost the globe an unstoppable pestilence.

Human immunodeficiency virus is an example of a zoonotic disease that could have been prevented. HIV can develop into acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS). AIDS is an incurable virus that has killed millions of people worldwide. Primitive tribes often hunt without protection from the environment, which puts them at risk of having an open wound. HIV was transferred from chimpanzees to tribal members in West Africa. Contrary to popular belief, the transfer of disease was most likely transmitted via blood, since the indigenous people could have easily received infected blood by means of an open wound while hunting. The highest infection rate of HIV is from cross contamination of blood, not sexual intercourse. Indigenous people are at risk of being wounded because for centuries they have hunted with little clothing. An infected chimpanzee could scratch a hunter and infect him or her. Protection against such an attack would prevent an infection.

The primary concern regarding disease control is education. Since a chimpanzee can not learn about disease prevention, the natives need to know what to do to stop an outbreak from happening. Educating the native people could be effective; however, educating all uncivilized tribes would be tremendously tedious. Yet, a simple education regarding sanitation and protection could make all the difference. Making indigenous people aware that raw meat puts their health at risk could drastically improve disease control. Supplying crude appliances that could prepare food would also help. All of these services could be used in exchange for a few blood tests to study. Every improvement should be made in consideration of how they live. Preserving the way they want to live should be a main concern. Such a large amount of public funds are used on medical research and other methods of disease control, and educating indigenous people would be just a small fraction of money spent on other disease control programs.

The possible benefits of increased awareness of disease control are boundless. An outbreak of the next plague could be eliminated before it starts. The next "superbug" could be diagnosed early and exterminated. Money spent now could be a great investment, considering that medicating people after a new illness could cost billions of dollars. Also, new knowledge of ways to combat illness could stop natives from being wiped out. For example, many of the natives in the Americas were killed by small pox when foreigners arrived. They had no knowledge of such a disease, and with an awareness of measures to stop disease, the wipeout of Native Americans could have been prevented. Plagues have killed countless people, and although much medical advancement has been made, all precautions should be made to ensure another will not happen.

I would promote knowledge of disease control by expanding involvement with the Peace Corps, churches, and health organizations to endorse volunteers in order to go to areas of the world with uncivilized people. Having volunteers would decrease the cost of labor of the entire movement, and would save money for the equipment to give to natives. A good estimate of the number of volunteers needed would be to find the approximate number of villages in each country. Sampling the entire population for blood tests is not required for the study. A random sample representing the population would be sufficient, lowering the cost of the study. The enlightenment of disease control would have to continue past five years because there will always be new measures to ensure protection. As for education, a mentor program with five volunteers per village would be adequate. Lastly, donating equipment is vital in establishing disease control. Long sleeve clothing, footwear, and appliances for cooking would be required to protect against wounds and to purify food. Afterwards, one final trip back would be made to evaluate effectiveness and to make changes for the better. The promotion would take place to advance and protect the people for today, tomorrow, and the future.

Science and technology is an ever growing industry, and disease control must continue to grow with it. If not, the very well-being of society is put into jeopardy. One major cause of disease is zoonosis, which is preventable. Zoonosis can be avoided by educating indigenous people in contact with animals similar enough to humans to have the ability to transfer diseases. However, preventing is easier said than done, and although the benefits are limitless, there are a few disadvantages. Changing the way of life for indigenous people is not something that should be forced. While prevention is not easy, it is necessary for the well being of the global society and definitely possible, but do the benefits exceed the liabilities? (1,070 words)
EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Oct 30, 2008   #2
Good afternoon.

You have an excellent response to the prompt. This essay is concise, thorough, and well organized. The paragraphs flow well from one to the next, and your introduction is a great trailer. I like your closing paragraph, but I have one issue with the last sentence. I wouldn't end this piece with a question. Rather, I would place a period after "possible" and end it there. Ending this piece with a question is awkward, since your voice and tone through the whole piece is very confident and strong. It also mentions benefits exceeding liabilities, something that wasn't discussed during the essay.

Other than that, it's a great piece. Nice work.

Regards,
Gloria
Moderator, EssayForum.com
OP bully 5 / 1  
Oct 30, 2008   #3
Thanks for your input! I always have had trouble ending essays. Your help is very appreciated.


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