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Google/ "Hands Out, Eyes Open"; Barnard Supp/ First learn? "majored in unafraid"


Minted95 1 / 1  
Dec 27, 2012   #1
Thank you so much for any advice you can offer. :)

A.) How did you first learn about Barnard College and what factors have influenced your decision to apply? Why do you think the College would be a good match for you?

A simple Google search marked my first encounter with Barnard College. Barnard ticks off all the boxes on my mental checklist of expectations - students who are academically driven, a location allowing for a sensible balance of play and work, and school traditions that bring the whole student body together. After delving into Barnard's history, I was pleasantly surprised to find that Zora Neale Hurston '28, an author whose books I have read many of, was an alumna of this establishment. Being an avid fan of her works, I always believed Hurston had an impeccable writing style that pulled at the heart strings of many of her readers. Knowing that Barnard had contributed to nurturing not only Hurston but many other individuals' talents reinforce my belief that Barnard is where I want to be.

C.) Alumna and writer Anna Quindlen says that she "majored in unafraid" at Barnard. Tell us about a time when you majored in unafraid.

On April 2, 2012 at 6:11PM, I performed at the Brooklyn Open, an event held by the Brooklyn Public Central Library to support fellow teenage poets, spoken word artists, and emcees as they present their material. Growing up, it wasn't wrong to say that I had a visceral fear of public speaking. I loathed having to present myself in front of others and I was afraid of being scrutinized even more. I didn't believe I had the intellect nor the wit to enamor my audience; to say the least, my self confidence was zilch. Years ago, the sheer idea of performing on stage would have made me nauseous. But there, under the glare of the spotlight and amidst a dim room with seats only partially filled up, I was able to recite my poem, "Hands Out, Eyes Open."

MustafaSalah - / 5 1  
Dec 28, 2012   #2
Wow, I think its so good really ,but is the right word "alumna" for graduates or "alumni" because I'm confused?,great job buddy ,your writing skills are good so please help me with my essay if you can,
OP Minted95 1 / 1  
Dec 28, 2012   #3
I'm pretty sure that alumna is a woman graduate but I'll double check. Thanks!
CMB19932015 3 / 18 4  
Dec 30, 2012   #4
Do you too want to be a writer can you bring more of yourself into the essay. Why are you an avid fan of hurston's work have a similar life story are you from the South does her description of Southern living connect with you?
AmoebaMan 4 / 15 2  
Dec 30, 2012   #5
Honestly, I like this. I don't think there's any way they can hold the Google search against you. They're probably fully aware that very many of their applicants share that in common, and it may even earn you points to have admitted it so frankly.

Other than that, I personally don't like the word "zilch", but that's a choice that is up to you.
katev 18 / 120 24  
Dec 30, 2012   #6
Zora Neale Hurston '28, an author whose books I have read many of,

Hurston, an author who wrote some of my favorite books... Not sure how you want to phrase this, but this is awkward and you can't end in a preposition

Being an avid fan of her works, I always

You could maybe give more reasons why it's a good choice for you. Sure, Hurston was great so maybe that means Barnard is great, but why is it perfect for you?

an event held by the Brooklyn Public Central Library to support fellow teenage poets, spoken word artists, and emcees as they present their material

Library that allows fellow teenage poets, spoken word artists, and emcees to share their material

Growing up, it wasn't wrong to say that I had a visceral fear of public speaking. I

It wasn't wrong?

my self confidence was zilch

I don't think something can be zilch
Try to relate this more to the prompt. Say how and why you were suddenly "unafraid." I think conquering your fears is different than being unafraid, so show how you were truly unafraid.


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