Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
The brutal, frigid winter in early January made me queasy. The year was 2005, and I was nine years old. Few days had passed since I first stepped on American soil. The feeling of jet lag had yet to fade and I still had trouble adapting to my new environment. I was in my new home, but my body was still in Indonesia. The evening was dull. Armed with Eskimo-like clothing, I sat on my lazy maroon leather couch, watching pointless cartoons to learn how to speak English.
As I slowly drifted off to sleep, I heard a familiar voice murmur. My uncle gave me a customary headlock to wake me. My uncle Rudy mumbled to me, "Come downstairs, I want to show you something." I followed him to our gloomy basement. As he powered on a bizarre looking machine, he whispered to me again, "I have a surprise for you," while pointing at it. I looked at the object with a confused expression. I asked "What kind of machine is it?" He told me the machine was a "computer." I had never seen anything like it. He emphasized that computers are expensive and rare in Indonesia, so I should feel gifted.
When I was growing up in Indonesia, I had a fixed mind that computers were complex and difficult to utilize. My uncle explained and demonstrated how computer programs and video games are produced. This was the first time I fell in love with computers, which in turn sparked my desire to become a computer engineer. Ever since, my interest had skyrocketed, and I was curious about how to build a computer, how they worked and how to fix them. One time when my uncle came home with a broken computer, I decided to take it apart. For the first time I saw the motherboard, hard drive, CPU and RAM. After several months of experimenting, I was able to fix the computer and make an upgrade in it by adding more RAM.
My fascination with innovations by major corporations such as Google, Microsoft and Apple helped me easily decide what I want to do in the future. Computers have made my lives easier and more convenient. Social networks have changed traditional way of communication. Previously, it was difficult and expensive to keep in touch with my family in Indonesia, but now I can keep in touch with them regularly and cheaper. They made it easier for me to access information though search engines, in Indonesia I had to go to the library and search precisely for the appropriate books. My ultimate goal is to engineer innovative devices that will benefit and make life easier for people like you and me.
I was in my new home, but my body was still in Indonesia.
Is it body or your soul ? .... How about?
I was in my new home in the USA, buy my soul was still in Indonesia.I had a fixed mind that computers were complex and difficult to utilize handle.
I guess "handle" sounds more appropriate :)
This was the first time I fell in love with computers, which in turn sparked my desire to become a computer engineer.
Up to this point, your essay was flowing in the mood of struggling to adapt to the new environment and to recover from the sorrow of leaving Indonesia. Now you suddenly bring in your love for computer.... I think you need a correction in between.
Computers have made my lives easier and more convenient.
Computers have made my life easier and more convenient. ... OR...
Computers have made many lives easier and more convenient.Social networks have changed traditional way of communication.
Social networking has changed the traditional way of communicating.They made it easier for me to access information though search engines, in Indonesia I had to go to the library and search precisely for the appropriate books.
They made it easier for me to access information through search engines. But in Indonesia I had to go to the library and look for the correct books to get what I need.I like your essay and the way you have shown your enthusiasm towards computing. :)
