I'm not sure which essay topic I'm going to go with, but I decided to write up a rough draft for one of them. Please give me any advice you have, and be mean if you have to; I can take it.
B.What is the best piece of advice you've ever been given, and why?
Being asked an incessant amount of questions by my four-year-old nephew and giving him an interminable number of answers reminds me of a time when I was just as persistent in my quest to satisfy all of my curiosities and also the two words that have become best advice I have ever been given.
When I was younger, like many children in my age group, I had somewhat of an obsession with Pokémon. In one specific case of Pokémon fever, my brother and I were having a dispute over the order of a certain Pokémon's evolutionary level when my mother, obviously tired of the unrelenting arguments and questioning, decided to step in and give us a word of advice. "Google it," she said simply. Not knowing what sort of alien magic of which she spoke, I inquired of her just what this "Google" was. When she showed me and eventually verified, of course, that I was correct in the argument, I reacted both by having my mind blown by this new sorcery and rubbing it in my brother's face that he was wrong.
Since that fateful day, Google has been one of my closest friends. No matter what it is with which I need assistance, be it homework, thirst for further knowledge, or simple boredom, nowhere is there a less biased or more reliable source than Google. Without Google, even such decisions as crucial as my college decision would not be nearly as informed. Skeptics may say that although Google is useful, it is not worthy of the title of best advice ever given, but surely when they are asked to provide support, the first place they will go is the place that they have condemned.
Past the obvious usefulness of Google, my mother's advice has led me to learn indirect life lessons. I have always been told that the sky is the limit, but after being introduced to Google, I disagree. I say that there is no limit! With all that Google has made possible, who is to say that anything is impossible? If we can go from searching for afternoon activities to shopping for a new car to discovering alternative fuel sources in just a few clicks and keystrokes, can we not discover a cure for cancer or develop a system of teleportation devices to increase the ease of daily transportation?
Seeing how two words can revolutionize my life and be seen as nothing more than just another disposable part of life two others really shows how one man's trash can be another man's treasure, but, regardless of Google's simplicity, I plan to Google throughout my stay at Brown and all the way to the end of the earth. All hail the power of Google!
This is an interesting essay. I have one suggestion:
I have always been told that the sky is the limit, but after being introduced to Google, I disagree. I say that there is no limit
I believe that the idiom means
that there is no limit.
I still don't think you fully understand. "The sky is the limit" is an idiom that was introduced, I believe, decades ago when there were no airplanes and when people believed there couldn't be airplanes - to them, the sky was indeed the limit. They believed that flying was impossible. However, now, it is obvious that we are past the sky, but we still the idiom grew into Modern English to mean that there is no limit. In other words, is supposed to be another way to say that limits don't exist...
Am I "overreading" this?
Zakary, I can only say you are a tool. A lemming. How can you be fascinated with a company that's the only purpose is to find out as much information about you as possible and then sell it to other companies for profit. You are exactly what Google wanted you to be and you perfectly fit their scenario. You may check insidegoogle.com to open your eyes.
I corrected a word here for you:
Seeing how two words can revolutionize my life and be seen as nothing more than just another disposable part of life
twoto others really shows how one man's trash can be another man's treasure, but, regardless of Google's simplicity, I plan to Google throughout my stay at Brown and all the way to the end of the earth.
But I think this entire paragraph is a run on sentence. If I were to rewrite it I would say:
It's incredible how two words of advice can revolutionize my life and in the eyes of another be seen as a disposable part of life. This gives truth to the saying, 'one man's trash is another's man's treasure'. Regardless of how simplistic Google may seem, I play to Google for the rest of my days.
Thank you, Rich, for your inspiring words of criticism. I was asking for assistance in my essay, not insults to me as a person.
Worry not about such things. Just concentrate on your essay -- and let's see what a revision might produce for us! I think that you did a good job with the first essay -- however, it did need some work and some other people have chimed in as well for you. Now, let's see if you can take the corrections and suggestions and come up with a revision of the initial essay and then you can present it to the forum. You can do it.
In other words, is supposed to be another way to say that limits don't exist...
I get what you are saying, but the way that I revised it, I was attempting to, in a way, put a play on what it really means and say that even though the idiom already suggests a lack of limit, there can be even less of a limit than the playfully stated limit.
Is that acceptable?
In having read both of your recent posts, it's obvious that you are creative and intelligent person...just a little unrefined. However, both of the possible admission essay selections that I have read don't do you much justice. In this essay, you are touting the powers of Google, which is ironic, because once enrolled in Brown, you'll be instructed to scrap the search engine and start using academic search databases, such as JSTOR, Project Muse, etc.. I also encourage you to simplify your writing style, which will increase your writing voice's authenticity. Don't try to impress Brown by using an advanced vocabulary, because that's not going to mean much in the selection process, especially if it detracts from the meaningfulness of your essay. You want to be personal and you want to promote qualities about yourself that reflect Brown's values. Maybe go to Brown's site and look at its mission statement. Maybe connect these values with your small-town upbringing or write about how you plan to use your education at Brown as a stepping stone for accomplishing something in your community. Again, best of luck!
In this essay, you are touting the powers of Google, which is ironic, because once enrolled in Brown, you'll be instructed to scrap the search engine and start using academic search databases, such as JSTOR, Project Muse, etc..
Zakary, I can only say you are a tool. A lemming.
That is a pretty awful thing to say to one of our new members. I apologize on behalf of Rich Monte.
Seeing how two words can revolutionize my life and be seen as nothing more than just another disposable part of life two others really shows how one man's trash can be another man's treasure
Holy moly, this is where you lost me... You get the Most Complicated Sentence Award.
I see that Stephanie did a great job to help with it.
If you want to write about the interesting aspects of Google, you can write about their innovative methods for fostering creativity among employees, the complexity of their page rank system, and so forth. Do a little research and mention some of the interesting points. Also, if possible it would be great to tell how Google is relevant to your intentions for your time at Brown.
It feels to academic. I think you should ease it up and make it a little less formal.
Kevin -- I was going to chime in with something of this nature, but I am too new to the crowd. I knew, however, that you would, eventually. I didn't know what to make of his comments, at first.
Sometimes we have some great arguments here.
Nah, don't hesitate to get into the scuffle. And Rich, I appreciate your enthusiasm despite the crudeness in this particular thread. These threads can create passionate argument, and sometimes it is okay to be a little aggressive. Writers need to be tough, and I think Zak can handle it! Truthfully, if being a fan of google makes someone a tool I am the biggest tool of all. But maybe the company participates in evil practices I do not know about? Their company motto is "Don't be evil," but that does not mean they are not evil.
but this does not make them evil:
a company that's the only purpose is to find out as much information about you as possible and then sell it to other companies for profit.
Welcome to the Information Age, Rich.
:-) Also, I am likely to say things that are too harsh, sometimes, too, so I apologize in advance.
your closest friends?
rich I am sure u are using google or have used google before so instead of insulting another person on information he didn't do.. go do useful stuff like helping other people.