Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 2


Government P.H Pilot High School Dadu


ishtiaqueahmed 2 / 1  
Nov 1, 2012   #1
Ahmed Zafari , sorry coz i'm not commenting on your topic actually i need your help in reviewing my SoP that i have written recectly, I want you to make it correct grammatically and spelling , punctuation and so on... i would be very thankful to you if you reply me as soon as possible.

iam writing it here..
Personal Statement
I have always been inspired to develope my understanding of the world around me, through reading books, articles and news. It is my aspiration to pursue a career in engineering.

Apart from that I have always thought about helping the people of my community in a way that could prove to beneficial. Accordingly, I have been teaching Mathematics to the students of matriculation of Government P.H Pilot High School Dadu during my vacations and also provide career counselling to them from time to time.

The U.S. has fascinated me in so many ways. It has stood forefront in the science and research and has done groundbreaking advancements in technology, astorlogy, medicine, etc. The U.S. is the land where people of different cultures and beliefs live with harmony and work for the prosperity of the country.

I believe that in the program I will be interacting with professors and a student body that will be culturally diverse with additional benefits of greater interaction and individual attention of the faculty.

I am very keen to join Global Undergraduate Exchange Program in the U.S. as I strongly believe that this will help me further my goals and I can prove to be a valuable asset to the community within my country.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Nov 19, 2012   #2
have always been inspired to develope my understanding of the world around me, through reading books, articles and news. It is my aspiration to pursue a career in engineering

(there is not connection between the first and the second sentences of the introduction.).

What Ahmad says is correct. You must tell how reading influenced you to become an engineer

Your essay fails to set up links between your ideas that disturbs its flow.... Also, when you make posts, include the prompt so that others would know what the prompt is asking you. That helps them to give a better feedback : )


Home / Undergraduate / Government P.H Pilot High School Dadu
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳