I'm struggling for my prompt2
this IS an important event that changed my perspective in life
but it seems like I am a bit off topic or not to the point, and I think i sound like I am begging for pity.
Please advice.
PROMTPT 2: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
In just one night, my grandmother could never remember me again. I was shocked when I heard about this news that she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. I lived with my grandmother since I was born. Not until this incidence happened do I truly understand how many things in life I had taken for granted. It was a wake up call for me.
My grandmother always took care of me when I was little. She brought me to bed when I was drilling all over on my copybook assignment; cooked for me when I woke up hungry in the middle of the night; raced with me and see who could first get the answer for my math addition problems. Then something changed. I grew up. I started to have my own life and friends. I also realized the existed conflicts between my mother and my grandmother. They fought for every single day, and my dad would be in the middle frustrated between his wife and his mother. It was almost cartoony. I started to doubt my grandmother's beliefs. I was mad at her always yelling at my mom, and since then I was distanced from her. It was one of my biggest regret in my life. I knew she loved me, but I failed to see pass her beliefs.
It was a big lesson for me. I finally understand how limited our time is, and how easy it is for us to loose track in it. It was a milestone that shaped me into a more enthusiastic person, and I learned to appreciate little things in life. It also led me to dig deeper into the lack of communication in my family. Studying in U.S was a subconscious move for me to escape from my family conflicts, but from then on I knew I need to stop ignoring and start engaging. My parents and I started to talk more, and we discovered how little we knew about each other. It led me to many questions in the topic of interpersonal connection, and I developed a strong desire to explore the field of Communication.
--------------------------------
My conclusion is especially worse cause I cannot think of how to end it besides linking it back to my major.
I am not really sure what u mean by cartonny? it sounds vague to me? mayb u could change a word?
Yes good spot, that was an unnecessary sentence actually. I'll edit it out. Thanks
I think this is such a great topic! I feel so sorry for your grandmother. I did not feel pity from reading it. I think you're fine. Also, I believe for prompt 2, since I'm doing it as well, there's the part about how it makes you proud. How does this expeerience make you proud?
I think that you should just take out the communication major. or that she forgetting you made you dig deeper into your family communication. You did make a connection, but the connection is extemely weak. I would just end it with saying her impact on you, and she has shaped you the way you are today, just expanding on your appreciation for life.
Just suggestions.
Please edit mines!
Best of luck
Hi,
Nice, but u need to work on ur conclusion.
Btw, I need your opinion about my common application essay, please read it and post your suggestions.
Thanks! Yes, my conclusion is very crappy and it sounds desperate. I will work on that!
