Essay A
Tell us about an opinion that you have had to defend or
an incident in your life which placed you in conflict with the
beliefs of a majority of people and explain how this affected
your value system.(500 words)
Being born and breed in Greece has, without a doubt, many advantages. The food is both tasteful and healthy, the weather is great and no matter where you live in Greece, the sea is always nearby. The people are warm-hearted, with a natural sense of humor and friendly even to strangers. On the other hand, when it comes to management and government finances, the Greeks made some huge mistakes in the past. Because of this, I had to defend myself and my people many times over the past few years and it wasn't a mean feat.
Greece has been in the center of discussions between economists worldwide. The enormous debt, the disorganized public sector and the appearance of one political scandal after another, made the Greeks look like the freeloaders of the European Union. Suddenly the Internet was overflowing with offensive articles, who called us thieves and frauds, unfit to inherit the Greek cultural heritage. I tried to answer to every article, explaining how the majority of my people are honest, hard-working men and women.
How labeling every citizen of Greece a fraud is racial discrimination.
A few months later, on September of 2010 I traveled to the United Kingdom as I was admitted to the Imperial College of London. My goal was to find a scholarship, or a part time job that could cover my living expenses, and study there for four years in a Masters in Engineering course. However, on arriving in College, the first thing anyone would ask me was related to the economical depression and my country's debt. I would tell them that not everything they hear in the news is true and that my people are doing their best to stabilize our economy. Some would go as far as to say that a debt this high can never be paid off in full and that Greece would be bankrupt by the end of the year. But I knew my parents, my friends and every other Greek citizen worked very hard to improve the situation back home. Thousands of people were working on the minimum wage. Many others lost their jobs. Small businesses closed every day. I defended these people and their struggles with all my strength.
Other problems appeared as well, during my stay in the UK. No matter how thoroughly I searched, I couldn't find a single scholarship or a job. Financial aid was only offered to UK, Scotland and Wales citizens and by the time I got to London, most of the places for part time jobs had already been filled.
So I though of taking a student loan in order to pay for my first year expenses. I turned to a private loans company that was stationed close to college. I was rendered speechless when the student loans executive informed me that my loan application has been rejected. The reason was that neither me or any other Greek citizen was trustworthy at that time, due to my country's enormous debt. He suggested, however, that I apply for a consumer loan, with a higher interest rate. I thanked him politely and left his office.
At that time it was obvious to me that I couldn't stay in the UK any longer. Not only was I offended by the prejudice of these people, I could not afford to stay in London anymore. I took the first plane back home. I was going to study at the Aristotle University of Thessaloniki, the university with probably the best engineering course in Greece. I want to believe that this experience was good for me. At first I was vastly frustrated, but I managed to turn my frustration to a strong resolve. Now I wish to succeed in whatever I do in my life and make all Greek people proud again.
-Ioannidis Leftys
It's about 600 words instead of 500, but I think it is worth the extra words. I couldn't tell my story with only 500 words. Thanks.
No answer yet? Come on guys, I have a deadline. I'll comment on your essays if you comment on mine.
Very good ideas and expression. You only had a few tiny errors, mostly comma-related, which I've corrected in red below.
Being born and bred in Greece has, without a doubt, many advantages. The food is both tasteful and healthy, the weather is great, and no matter where you live in Greece, the sea is always nearby. The people are warm-hearted, with a natural sense of humor, and are friendly even to strangers. However , when it comes to management and government finances, the Greeks have made some huge mistakes in the past. Because of this, I have had to defend myself and my people many times over the past few years, which is not a mean feat.
Greece has been in the center of discussions between economists worldwide. The enormous debt, the disorganized public sector and the appearance of one political scandal after another, all make the Greeks look like the freeloaders of the European Union. Suddenly the Internet was overflowing with offensive articles, who called us thieves and frauds, unfit to inherit the Greek cultural heritage. I tried to answer to every article, explaining how the majority of my people are honest, hard-working men and women, how labeling every citizen of Greece a fraud is racial discrimination.
A few months later, on September of 2010, I traveled to the United Kingdom, as I had been admitted to the Imperial College of London. My goal was to find a scholarship or part-time job that could cover my living expenses, and to study there for four years in a Masters in Engineering course. However, on arriving in College, the first thing anyone would ask me was related to the economical depression and my country's debt. I would tell them that not everything they hear in the news is true and that my people are doing their best to stabilize our economy. Some would go as far as to say that a debt this high can never be paid off in full and that Greece would be bankrupt by the end of the year. But I knew my parents, my friends and every other Greek citizen worked very hard to improve the situation back home. Thousands of people were working on the minimum wage. Many others lost their jobs. Small businesses closed every day. I defended these people and their struggles with all my strength.
Other problems appeared as well during my stay in the UK. No matter how thoroughly I searched, I couldn't find a single scholarship or a job. Financial aid was only offered to UK, Scotland and Wales citizens, and by the time I got to London, most of the places for part-time jobs had already been filled.
So I thought of taking out a student loan in order to pay for my first year's expenses. I turned to a private loans company that was stationed close to college. I was rendered speechless when the student loans executive informed me that my loan application has been rejected. The reason was that neither I nor any other Greek citizen was trustworthy at that time, due to my country's enormous debt. He suggested, however, that I apply for a consumer loan, with a higher interest rate. I thanked him politely and left his office.
At that time it was obvious to me that I couldn't stay in the UK any longer. Not only was I offended by the prejudice of these people, I could not afford to stay in London anymore. I took the first plane back home. I was going to study at the Aristotle University of Thessaloniki, the university with probably the best engineering course in Greece. I want to believe that this experience was good for me. At first I was vastly frustrated, but I managed to turn my frustration to a strong resolve. Now I wish to succeed in whatever I do in my life and make all Greek people proud again.
You need one more comma here:
Being born and breed in Greece has, without a doubt, many advantages. The food is both tasteful and healthy, the weather is great, and ...
Great edit, William, as always.
I think the whole essay can be intensified if you specify a little more clearly in that first paragraph what the opinions/conflicts are going to be.
You took a great approach to this prompt!
BTW if you respond to some other people who recently posted, you can ask them to return the favor! No one is going to see your plea for help unless you visit THEIR threads first. ;-)
Thank you everyone. Unfortunatelly I didn't have the time to correct the mistakes you specified. Do you think the guys from the admissions office will understand?
