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Greek mythology ; COMMON APP - What fascinates me!


Iskander 2 / 5  
Jan 11, 2013   #1
Prompt: What fascinates you?
I would not have written this essay if I had not gone to my uncle's house for the summer holidays, five years ago. I vividly remember my first encounter with an ancient history book that I found on one of my uncle's bookshelves; it was Ancient Greeks history and mythology. After the first reading, I loved this book like nothing else before. Beautiful illustrations made it even more interesting for my child mind; majestic Zeus, mighty Poseidon, formidable Hades and others, all of them made a commanding impression and awakened a great interest in me. Reading Ancient Greeks mythology became one of my major hobbies and it is still to this days.

Most important thing that the ancient myths glorify is that man should always aim to enhance both-his body and soul. Nowadays it is a very real issue, because a lot of teenagers are either concerned only with their appearance or with the study and paying no attention to their health. However, it is enough to look at ancient heroes, strong physically and mentally, to understand, what must be the ideal to strive for. Also, I like the presence of very deep sense, which is not always possible to find at first, but which necessarily raises questions about a lot basic and essential things in this life.

Ancient myths made great impact on my personality and my views on life: I understood that I should always try to perfect myself and there is always place for growth and improvement. Moreover, I became much more interested in history and I think it is great, because as one quote says:" Study the past if you would define the future."

I am applying to Union, I would appreciate honest and constructive criticism.

y2kendoll 2 / 8 1  
Jan 11, 2013   #2
For starters I would have to give you a C on your essay. One reason being, and this is simply from experience. People, especially teachers of higher learning NEVER want you to start a sentence with something negative.

Instead you could have simply said, What facinates me? Well five years ago, while spending my summer holiday at my uncle's house I came upon a book on ancient greek history and mythology.If it was a positive experience that still fuels you today, why would you start it of with a negative connotation.

I hope that makes sence,
I would not have written this essay if I had not gone to my uncle's house for the summer holidays, five years ago. I vividly remember my first encounter with an ancient history book that I found on one of my uncle's bookshelves; it was Ancient Greeks history and mythology. After the first reading, I loved this book like nothing else before. Beautiful illustrations made it even more interesting for my child mind; majestic Zeus, mighty Poseidon, formidable Hades and others, all of them made a commanding impression and awakened a great interest in me. Reading Ancient Greeks mythology became one of my a major hobbies y and it is still to this days .

An ancient myth believed by the greeks was that manMost important thing that the ancient myths glorify is that man should always aim to enhance both-his body and soul. I believe that to be a real issue nowadaysNowadays it is a very real issue , because a lot of teenagers are either too concerned only with their appearance or with their study and paying no attention to their health.

However, it is enough to look at ancient heroes, strong physically and mentally, to understand, what must be the ideal to strive for. Also, I like the presence of very deep sense, which is not always possible to find at first, but which necessarily raises questions about a lot basic and essential things in this life.- I don't understand what your trying to communicate in this part, maybe a more clarification will help.

Ancient myths made great impact on my personality and my views on life: I understood that I should always try to perfect myself and there is always place for growth and improvement. Moreover, I became much more interested in history and I think it is great, because as one quote says:" Study the past if you would define the future."

I think this part closes out your essay very well maybe a little tweaking it as far as your wording is concerned will suffice. Other than that good job.

If your going to quote someone please, please, please give them credit.
"Study the past if you would define the future." â€- Confucius
OP Iskander 2 / 5  
Jan 12, 2013   #3
Thanks!You've been very helpful!
y2kendoll 2 / 8 1  
Jan 12, 2013   #4
Any time...good luck!


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