'Growing up on an island' - usd - international study supplement

Hello, below is my supplement for University of San Diego's supplement.

USD QUESTION: As a Catholic university, the values below represent some of the most important characteristics of the USD experience. Please select one of the topics below and explain how you might enhance our community or benefit from that particular value. (100 words or less) I chose "International experiences"

Growing up on an island has isolated me from gaining personal insight of the diverse cultures shared in this world. I've always wanted to explore the world, and USD's top ranked international study caught my attention. Studying abroad is the perfect opportunity to transition into a multicultural learning experience. By broadening my knowledge and maturing as a globally active citizen, I'll be exposed to see the reality of this interconnected world we live in and engage in its challenging endeavors. I want to open my mind to new perspectives and USD's international studies will empower me to do so.

Please give me some feedback about the grammar, content, and flow. I'd really appreciate your help :)

By broadening my knowledge and maturing as a globally active citizen, I'll be exposed to see the reality of this interconnected world we live in, and engaged in its challenging endeavors.

I want to open my mind to new perspectives, and USD's international studies will empower me to do so.

This is fine, but I think you should tell what island you grew up on, to make it more personal. Good luck with school!

:)

thank you for the input!