With a diverse educational community comes different people, different cultures, different languages, different ethnicities, etc.
This is a very obvious statement. You should go beyond the obvious and make your own unique points about diversity. As I continue to read, I see that you did this successfully later on in the essay.
Sure, we follow some of the
paths our parents have laid out of u
s, but eventually we find ourselves
as being a becoming new
versions of our parents because of what we've learned about ourselves from others.
I think the essay does make some unique observations about diversity... thanks for posting this!!