Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Half a Bindhi
Kids would walk by, their noses scrunching up as they saw me. I didn't smell but I guess they thought I did. They used to raise their brows in shock when I tried mingling with them. After a lesson on Gandhi, boys looked at me and snickered. The school hallway echoed with the chanting of "Gandhi dot...Gandhi dot."
I was the only one who wore a bindhi (a sticker that is kept in the middle of the forehead and symbolizes Hinduism) to school. People judged me by my appearance. They assumed that I was not "cool" and that I ate smelly food. At lunchtime, I didn't have anyone to play with. At the age of 10, I didn't understand the value of having a culture different from that of everybody else's. Frankly speaking, I simply didn't want the kids at my school to keep making fun of my bindhi. After much dispute with my parents, I finally got permission not to wear it.
By the time I reached high school, I had made a new group of friends. These friends didn't know the bindhi-me. They did know that I could not talk about the latest American albums and movies. Of course, I could tell them all about the latest Indian pop stars, but then they would probably laugh at me.
Even in a community college, people still look at one another and judge each other. At the start of Spring semester, a new immigrant from India was enrolled in my biology class. She was wearing a bindhi. She reminded me of my old self; back when I was always the girl criticized for wearing a bindhi. My friends looked at her the same way the kids in elementary school had looked at me. I was so frustrated at the thought that if I were still wearing a Bindhi today, people would make faces at me. I yelled at my friends for the low respect they showed for someone of my culture. My friends were not sure why I was shunning them until I confessed to them that I used to wear a bindhi to school.
The next day in my class, I didn't sit with my friends. When I returned home, I had a message from my friends expressing their apologies. I returned the following day class with increased confidence and invited my friends to come to my cultural show, where I would be performing a classical Indian dance. For once I wasn't trying to hide anything.
The night of the cultural show, I could see a row of my friends looking up at me as I danced the intricate steps. I wore a golden pleated dress and a red blouse. And I also wore my bindhi.
I think this a very valuable experience to share. However, I think you could fine-tune your essay a few ways to make it more understandable.
While I got the general idea of what you got from your experience, I think you are capable of making it more precise. A couple of lines after the "For once I wasn't trying to hide anything." explaining exactly why this experience might be useful. Others might disagree with me that that is redundant though so get other advice about it.
A couple of parts you could do away with such as the line "They did know that I could not talk about the latest American albums and movies. Of course, I could tell them all about the latest Indian pop stars, but then they would probably laugh at me." and instead replace it with more examples of how you hid the "real you". The essay reads like the only part of you you hid was your bindhi, when I'm sure you have more to say than that.
I hope this is helpful at all! Thanks for sharing!
