Ever since I started to think about my future, health and science has been my top consideration.
This is because I would like to I always wanted to serve in the health industry in the future and help others. After deep consideration, I discovered thatI have decided to further study Food and Nutrition I am interested to further study in . There are two main reasons that helped me decide, the society and myself ( save this sentence for the conclusion) . First, I noticed that in the recent years, aging and obesity became a global issue. As there are more and more elderly in the societymedicine advances so does life expectancy , the health industry will need to provide more care and services themto the elderly . One of the areas that could be improved is the eating habits. Helping them to develop and maintaining a healthy eating habit is very important to their health. the other hand, Obesity is really dangerous to our health and it can lead to a lot of serious illnesses. Therefore, more diet plans should be developed in order to help the people that are suffering in obesity to succeed in dieting.
Find another way to transition to the second paragraph using "Second" feels too formal
Second , I really likelove to eat and cook. I am always interested in trying new and tasty foods. However, I would like to still be healthy, therefore I thinkwant to study food and nutrition to help me to develop a better understanding of which kinds of food are better and healthier for me. I like to spend time and dospent hours researches and find researching differentnew healthy recipes that are healthy and will provide nutrients to us . This is because I would like plan to enter the food and nutrition program in the future andto obtain morefurther professional knowledge.
that after completion of the Food and Nutrition program, it would lead to many job opportunities that are will prepare me for a career in the health industry. Dietitians in clinic and hospital would provide professional advice to the patience and help them develop a healthy diet. Dietitians working in the food industry may help to give advice and monitor to produce healthy product or meals to the company. Dietitians may also work with specific group of people such as children, elderly or patients with illness. I believe that after the completion of the Food and Nutrition program, there will be a lot of potential careers or job opportunities in the market that I will be passionate in.
You have a good Idea, try not to write this essay like how you write an essay for school. You are being too formal by writing "first" "second" to open a new paragraph. You lost focus in the conclusion and I was confused about the Dietitian information, do you want to be one?. Try to look out for repetition, each sentence should build upon the previous and not repeat the same idea.