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Henry miller, man's destiny - my undergrad admissions essay


mimi101 2 / 2  
Nov 1, 2008   #1
Please make corrections on any grammatical errors and suggestions on how i can improve it. Thank you.

Topic: Evaluate a significant experience or achievement that has special meaning to you.

Henry miller once wisely said, "Every man has his own destiny: the only imperative is to follow it, to accept it, no matter where it leads him." Arising from a spiritual family, I vehemently believe that God set everyone on this earth with a sole purpose in life. I am convinced that every event that occurs in your life is in some way, shape, or form apart of the plan God has specially made for you. Some people spend a lifetime trying to discover that one purpose. However, I did not have to look very far.

Growing up, I watched my mother pave her way through nursing school, and become a Licensed Practical Nurse. While other kids would be reading their comic books, I would be swept up in her medical books. Just like that I instantly developed a passion for medicine. With the medical field being so broad, the next step I would have to face would be discovering which area of study I want to specialize in.

I was hit with destiny in the summer of 2006. My mother and I visited our family in Kingston, Jamaica. It was a convivial trip filled with reuniting with family members and friends from the past. On the last day of our memorable trip, we had not yet seen my Aunt, who worked at a local children's hospital. My mother made a spontaneous decision to surprise her at her job. Upon entering the hospital, the dispiriting sight of the children was a heavy blow to my heart. The hospital was crowded with sick abandoned children born from teenage parents. The glum look in their eyes haunts me until this day. Right then and there I made a solid vow to become a pediatrician and make a difference in children's lives.

Experiencing the horrifying condition of those ill children has pointed me in the direction I need to be heading in life. I know God sent me to those children for a reason; I was their hope. They continue to be my motivation. My success as a high school student is owed to them. My ultimate goal is to return to Jamaica and establish a successful foundation that will provide abandoned children with homes and a proper education. I have gladly devoted my life to see children in those states one day smile.
EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Nov 2, 2008   #2
You've done a good job of explaining this event, but not a lot of evaluation of it. Try to include a bit more analysis as to what/how this visit has changed you as a person. How do you see life differently? How do you feel about various situations differently? Are you a better or worse person (and in what way) than you were before this trip?


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