Any advice or criticism is welcome.
The word limit for both essays is 100 words.
We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do for the pleasure of it.
My greatest passion lies in competing.
This hobby comes in various forms with one common trait, the desire to best others, and is not limited to games or sports. With the right mindset, even trivial matters like studying, eating or talking can be turned into interesting contests. As I have tried to keep this mentality at all times, I have found that such small competitions not only serve as a powerful motive for self-improvement, but they can also turn even the most boring, tedious tasks into a very thrilling experience. It all depends on how you see them!
(98 words)
Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why?
When it comes to choosing my major, there is no doubt in my mind that I want to study in the field of computer science.
I have been around computers ever since I was little, and I have always been fascinated by their controversial nature: while they abide by a strict set of instructions, they still leave vast space for creativity.
As I grew older, I started learning programming, systems administration, and cybernetics, which only strenghened my attraction and aspired me to work with such machinery.
(86 words)
I have been around computers ever since I was littleall my life , and I have always been fascinated by their controversial nature: while they abide by a strict set of instructions, they still leave vast space for creativity.
As I grew older, I started learning programming, systems administration, and cybernetics, which only strengthened my attraction, and aspired me to work with such machinery.
If you can sum this up with one powerful ending sentence, it'll be great!
:)
How about this, then? I am not sure what I could replace "aspiration" with in the last sentence, though.
When it comes to choosing a major, there is no doubt in my mind that I want to study in the field of computers.
I have been around computers all my life, and I have always been fascinated by their controversial nature: while they abide by a strict set of instructions, they still leave vast space for creativity.
As I grew older, I started learning programming, systems administration, and cybernetics, which only strengthened my attraction and aspired me to work with such machinery. Thus, I believe that Computer Science department would provide the best opportunity to pursue my aspiration.
I love your essay, especially the first one you definately answered the prompt. You did a good job on the review for the second one. Good luck:)
Can you please check my Johns Hopkins essay. THanks in advance
Maybe you need little stronger conclusion for the first one,
"When it comes to choosing my major, there is no doubt in my mind that I want to study in the field of computer science."
This is a very long sentence, considering that it has only two informations
computer science, and no doubt.
The first part is not unnecessary. Remember: MIT wants you to be concise.
The rest is great.
By the way, would you mind checking out my revised sadness essay?
