okay now this is the complete essay
Although it is difficult to gauge the influences of other people on me, my grandfather (Baba) has had a profound influence on me, he would often say "The way you think, the way you eat and the way you behave are significant factors that shape people's opinion about you". These words although pretty obvious have played a major role in shaping my life. Baba was a learned man who had experienced LIFE. He was a raconteur and would tell anecdotes from his own life. The best part, I could relate to each of his narrations, moreover they were followed by a moral.
Born to a farming family in colonial India, he entered a world where Indians were the oppressed class, but there was one thing he didn't lack ; self confidence. He had that 'never say die ' spirit (that has been inherited by my father as well) which resulted in his becoming a sociology professor (that to in a reputed university). I have a few books written by him, but unfortunately I am not that qualified to read and UNDERSTAND them (probably because he addressed social issues in his books) . I don't want to brag but he was arguably the best in his village.
He was a man with an iron will, even his staph infection , a respiratory disease caused by the staphylococcus bacteria, was unable to abate his energy. He had a rule that governed his life and it goes like this "Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity so does the mind lose it's vigors due to inactivity ". he advocated that one should always try to be active no matter what the circumstances might be (for as long as he/she can ). These words were irrelevant to me back then, but now that I don't have him with me anymore I realize that he was a man with infinite wisdom. I wish he would be with me to guide me through my problems. See, Some things just can't be learned , they come with experience. He always told me that whenever an opportunity presents itself you grab it and give it your best shot. I am a player of tennis, it was only because of his constant appraisal that I was able to participate in tennis tournaments.
When I was in sixth grade, Inspired by his habit of writing , I wrote a book called 'Norbert' which was about a young dragon who faced the problems comparable to a 13 year old human child and is forced by his parents to fly away to a far off island to prove his worth. Although I could never gather the courage to get it published but I WROTE A BOOK!! . He would often sit down with me and make me write letters , and I would often wonder "why is he making me write letters when everyone is shifting to E-mail (yeah! at that time there was no facebook)". It is only now that I realize he was improving my understanding of the international language (English). My Baba was the person who instilled an interest for the 'discovery channel' in a 'cartoon network' loving child like me.
The other thing that left me in total awe was his love for discipline. Whenever you entered his room you would never find anything lying here and there (probably the reason why as a kid I used to ask him to iron my school shirt). In spite of being such a disciplined person he didn't force anything upon me or others . It is only now I realize that discipline leaves one's mind uncluttered , thereby resulting in one thinking in the positive direction.
I am saying this again but the reason why I'm so impressed by my grandfather was his wisdom and will power . Although he left me for heaven when I was in my 8th grade he's the reason why I got a perfect CGPA in my tenth grade.
I don't know for what reason but somehow he saw himself in me (at least that is what I thought). Because he would often compare me with himself. And say " beta , one should always learn from one's mistakes".
I remember, he had a dream which was to see the world (or at least the whole of India ). Sadly, this remained a dream and I feel it to be my moral duty (as his favorite grandson) to make him proud and take the name of this family a notch higher . I know Baba you'll be watching me from above .
feedback and criticism is welcome and appreciated...
You did not mention how your grandpa could influence your life throughout the essay. I think you should focus more on your behavior and your own experiences. How could the things that you learned from your grandpa influence your social behavior, personality, etc? This essay should portray you not your grandpa.
Do you think i am going in the right direction with this please do comment
Yes I think you are in the right direction. Just try to talk more about yourself through the following paragraphs :)
When I was in sixth grade, Inspired by him, I wrote a book called 'Norbert' about a young dragon who faced the problems comparable to a 13 year old human child and is forced by his parents to fly away to a far off island to prove his worth.
What thing or event brought this idea to your mind? It would be better to link it to your grandpa. For example you can say the story of this book is similar to the story of your grandpa's life or something like that. Did your grandpa help you as you were working on the book? How?
he was trying to improveing my understanding ofproficiency in English, as the global scientific language.the international language (English) .
You could make the essay like a conversation between you and your grandpa. He is not beside you now, but you could talk to him in your mind, and in this way you could make the essay more emotional.
Take a look at the following link: "essayforum.com/writing-feedback-3/have-been-role-model-essay-inspiration-43970/". I think this is a good work that may help you to improve your work
