"Interested in nursing since my nephew was born" - UCI Nursing Supplemental Essay

Prompt
Please provide information regarding your goals and plans for the future as it relates to the Program in Nursing Science and the Nursing profession. Please limit statement to 200-225 words.

Nursing has always been a particular interest of mine ever since my nephew, Ashton, was born six years ago. As he was born with spina bifida and suffers heavily from epilepsy, his frequent trips to the hospital seem regular. Most often, I assist my sister in these trips to the hospital. I found my interest in nursing while on these trips because the work that entails with nursing fascinated me. The fact that the work of a nurse is different everyday due to the changing human factor of patients is what I find to be the most appealing feature about the occupation of nursing. The treatment of patients, starting IV's, and everything about nursing is exactly what I am looking for in a profession. In the future, I hope to become a registered nurse through the Irvine nursing program and work in close relations with the specialty of pediatrics or the NICU. I would love to work with children especially because through my past relations with children and by helping my nephew, I have learned great patience and motherly characteristics. I am aware that it takes a strong heart to deal with children and it is a trait of mine that is most apparent in my personality. Nursing is my passion, it is my future career, and it is what I was born to do.

This is a VERY rough version of my statement. It is exactly 225 words so hopefully I don't need to add anything. I would appreciate any help and/or criticism because I want this to be perfect!

Thank you so much in advance (:

i like what you're getting at, but you should go back and check grammar and sentence structure. make the paragraph flow...because right now it seems very choppy.

Let's use a semi-colon so that this will not be a run on sentence:
As he was born with spina bifida and suffers heavily from epilepsy; his frequent trips to the hospital seem regular.

...with the specialty of pediatrics or the NICU. ----Very good! It is impressive that you have put some thought into the career you want.

Nursing is my passion, it is my future career, and it is what I was born to do.---awesome! Well, I want to tell you that many "philosophies of nursing" exist. If you learn about "nursing philosophy" by reading online, you can determine your own philosophy of nursing and give a sentence or two about it. The essay is already very good, though!

Thank you SO much! I will work on the things you've pointed out. :)