If I had to pick one main reason for my decision to apply to Hofstra I would chooseMy main reasons for appling to Hofstra are their concentration and excellence in providing students with a urge to maintain on their career paths and never give up.
its a 500 character essay cut out the wordy-ness!
I didnt see any grammitical mistakes for the rest of the Hofstra essay, but overall, that essay is really really weak. You can basically copy paste any college in the name slot and it would apply. A 500 character essay needs to be concise BUT also full of detail. you said ur reason is concentration and excellence, give examples of how it is "concentration and excellence" preferably things that other colleges dont have.
Probably my favorite aspect about NYU is that they are always trying to get you involved and challenge you not only
in academic but social aspectsacademically, but also socially .
NYU is singular so technically it should be "it is" and not "they are." Also the end had a grammar mistake
I fell education should not be limited to one field of study
To me, my most remarkable area of study is computers.
this sentence is wordy. remarkable feels like a bad word to use consider using a different one. "area of study" = subject
Although I do wish to not only further my understanding of computers, but also combine the aspect with other areas of study and produce benefits in every aspect of the world.
Anyways, best of luck on NYU and hofstra, i applied to NYU too :o
if you get a chance, read my stony brook essay plz! thx