Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 3


"The Key to all Doors" - UC Prompt #1


agr93 1 / 1  
Nov 26, 2010   #1
Prompt # 1: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Ever since I started the application process for universities I have realized how fortunate I am for having the opportunity to an education. I believe that been a first generation student going to college it gives me the privilege to be in the United States of America, which offers an infinite number of opportunities to better the lives of those who want to better themselves, like myself. I come from a very modest family who migrated from Mexico for the only purpose that their children could study, because in Mexico it would not be possible. Since I arrived to the United States, I have struggled a lot to learn the language, that has not been easy but I have never given up; also to do my assignments since both of my parents were not able to help me. However, I have overcome my struggle with the help of others and my very own efforts. All the challenges I have gone through have shaped my dreams and aspirations because every effort has made me stronger and it will pay back the day I obtain a career.

My parents taught me that if I dream big and do my best and I will achieve. Every time I remember their words, I get sentimental and give myself an extra push to follow the path for success, which is education. With this on mind I plan to achieve and overcome any circumstances that life can put me in to. Everything that comes I will use as a stepping stone to help me get anywhere I want. I believe that maintaining positive is the key to walk thought the road of success. I know that to any university I go to I will be a great student, that will accomplish a lot for the school and for myself.
flickrndais 1 / 4  
Nov 26, 2010   #2
Ever since I started the application process for universities I have realized how fortunate I am for having the opportunity to an education. I am a first generation student going to college, which I'm proud of.(that seems a little out of place, try rewriting it to tie into the privileges the US gives you) I believe that it is a privilege to be in the United States of America, which offers an infinite number of opportunities to better the lives of those who want to better themselves, like myself. I come from a very modest family who migrated from Mexico for the only purpose that their children, my sister and I could study,(it seems a little unnecessary to state you and your sister) because in Mexico it would not be possible. From then on,(from when? I don't think you stated a time) I have struggled a lot to learn the language, that has not been easy but I have never given up, and also to do my assignments since both of my parents were not able to help me. However, I have overcome my struggle with the help of others and my very own efforts. All the challenges I have gone through have shaped my dreams and aspirations because I know that every effort has made me stronger, (something needs to be added here to make the sentence more fluid ) will pay back the day that(take "that" out) I obtain a career .

My parents taught me to dream big, to do my best and I will achieve.(my parents taught me that if I dream big and do my best I will achieve.) Every time I remember their words, I get sentimental and give myself an extra push to follow the path for success, which is education. With this in mind I plan to achieve and overcome any circumstances that life can put me into prove(take out "prove" or perhaps separate "into" to "in to") . Everything that comes I will use it(take out "it") as a stepping stone to help me get anywhere I want. I believe that maintaining positive is the key to walk thought the road of success. I know that to any university I go to I will be a great student, that will accomplish a lot for the school and for myself.
OP agr93 1 / 1  
Nov 27, 2010   #3
I have made the changes, to the prompt... And Thank You Daisy for you help,


Home / Undergraduate / "The Key to all Doors" - UC Prompt #1
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳