If there has been some obstacle or "bumb in the road," in your academic or personal life, please explain the circumstances.
Changing to a public school from an extremely small Montessori school--my previous grade only containing seven other students--was the hardest obstacle I have ever had to overcome. I wasn't used to being around many people, getting work done for the next day, and getting from class to class.
The most important lesson I learned from this transfer was that I cannot expect to live the same life forever and I need to know how to adapt more easily to changes. At the Montessori I was surrounded by the same people for eight years. When arriving at King, the public school, I knew absolutely no one. I had to find a way to gain new friends which made me come out of my comfort zone the Montessori provide. Going to King changed me from being the reserved girl that only talked to her friends and stayed with what I knew to someone that went after what she wanted even if it was something completely new and involved getting to know new people.
It is a good essay.You basically talked about the impact the change of school had on you and thats good. Add more voice to the other parts of the essay and it will be great
I like how you talk about the transformation you went through. I think you should be a little bit more specific. For example, say more of what exactly changed in you as a person!
i agree with trevor. i find your account is reflective but not enough in the details. perhaps you can give instances from one or two occasion which demonstates the change in you.