Tell us about a time when you struggle to convince someone of something you believed to be right. How did the process go? What was the end result? (Approximately 500 words)
I never thought that i could finally persuade someone, whose age was about three times of mine, to agree to lend the plaza in front of the shopping mall to us in spite of the countless trifles and irritations. I never thought that i could eventually convince someone, who apparently laid more stress on profit than social responsibility due to today's social environment which was filled with grandiosity and vanity, that it could not be more right to say yes to the right to use the plaza for free for promoting the idea of water resources saving and water protection. I never thought that i could prevail on someone someday, who possessed rich experience and was indifferent to most rhetoric, to nod in agreement to be a member of our campaign which was launched to propagandize the 'World Water Day'.
Actually, i did do it! I succeeded in convincing the manager of the shopping mall to agree my pledge on behalf of my team members, which i believed to be right though it took me a long hard time.
Working as the leader of the student volunteer team of my high school, I launched a 'Water Saving' campaign on the 'World Water Day' on March.22th, 2009 so as to propagandize the 'Water Resources Protection'. Considering the participation of our school band 'MAX' to draw more people to concern about this campaign, I selected an ideal open space in front of a shopping mall at last to be the site for our campaign. So i immediately found the executive of the shopping mall to tell him our purpose and persuaded him to lend the plaza for free owing to the shortage of the funds. However, the moment he learnt about the campaign, he decidedly refused to let the space since i was a minor though i took charge of the whole campaign and if something unpredictable happened during the campaign, of course he would be the accused one. In a split second, i realized that i had omitted the key of the success in convincing the executive of the rightness of the decision. Therefore, i submitted a declaration of our campaign to the teachers in Student Affairs. Subsequently, one teacher was assigned to assume the responsbility of monitoring our campaign and i also showed the permission of the school to the executive the second time i went to his office to ask for the use of the plaza.
Unfortunately, my plea was rejected again. He listed three reasons. First, from the perspective of a businessman, it was a purely disinterested operation. Second, even the normal operation of the shopping mall might be influenced to some extent. Third, offering us the open space would call for money and manpower and it was troublesome to submit the report to the concerned department. Nevertheless, i did not retreat at all because i had prepared ample reasons to convince him of what i believed to be right and i had strong self-confidence, astute judgement, resolute character and social attitude. Thus, i refuted him with the three opposite reasons. "Firstly, while you work as a businessman, you are also a citizen, so you are under the obligation to propagandize the idea of water resources saving and water protection and such campaign will arouse more people's social responsibility. Secondly, our band will attract more people and even the attention of press media to come to the plaza, so there is no need to worry about the normal operation. Thirdly, we will help to vacuum and tidy the plaza and i promise that the plaza will be the same as before. I do believe it is right for dear you to respond to my plea." Thankfully, after my genuine words and his deliberation, the executive ultimately turned positive to the campaign.
-----------------
BTW, it's really difficult for me to abridge the essay but i must do so. Could anyone give some advice? Thanks very much.
I never thought that i could finally persuade someone, whose age was about three times of mine, to agree to lend the plaza in front of the shopping mall to us in spite of the countless trifles and irritations. I never thought that i could eventually convince someone, who apparently laid more stress on profit than social responsibility due to today's social environment which was filled with grandiosity and vanity, that it could not be more right to say yes to the right to use the plaza for free for promoting the idea of water resources saving and water protection. I never thought that i could prevail on someone someday, who possessed rich experience and was indifferent to most rhetoric, to nod in agreement to be a member of our campaign which was launched to propagandize the 'World Water Day'.
The entire first paragraph has a negative connotation to it which may put the reader off. Probably rewording would solve the problem.
Overall, the essay is quite well written and lucid. :))
Will you please check my essay too?
